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旧金山
上城
进士出身


Joined: 15 Mar 2007
Posts: 2024
Location: 江夏黄鹤楼
上城Collection
PostPosted: 2011-08-06 17:38:38    Post subject: 旧金山 Reply with quote

梁启超:吾以为欲观华人之性质在世界上占何等位置,莫如在旧金山。


乘船登陆
或搭车顺路拈首古风
飞机两点一线地球截句
译名是那多音节
不要排场去乡下
单寻对偶

旧金
如山
三藩市

洗衣、做饭、行医
上城、修路、博弈

被逼无路
发财致富
千金一掷
灯红酒绿

唐装妙绝句
再苦再辱不忘
我是中国人

是谁谁的地盘
是谁谁的出生地

只为筑梦一忍再忍
尸骨未寒轨道下大陆
海风为我证明

在危险的西部丛林
剥掉白人头皮的红印度人
不是被猎枪圈堵的动物
有罪的稀有物种

折断弓和箭
他们不再亲如兄弟
嘻哈着土语革命
同志自由
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每个诗人都很重要
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博弈
榜眼


Joined: 21 Dec 2006
Posts: 4381
Location: SFO
博弈Collection
PostPosted: 2011-08-07 22:30:04    Post subject: Reply with quote

油個

京北經緯沙漠漠
海上欸乃船纷纷
今人不道古陽關
更西仍有舊金山
儒道有祖釋並裁
美人君子無多愛
不關山川風月癢
豈止江南佛跳牆

Laughing
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(在不斷的審醜裡終將建立起新的審美)
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博弈
榜眼


Joined: 21 Dec 2006
Posts: 4381
Location: SFO
博弈Collection
PostPosted: 2011-08-07 23:03:09    Post subject: Reply with quote

再油

王出岐山
溫乃家寶
習民近平
胡同錦濤
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上城
进士出身


Joined: 15 Mar 2007
Posts: 2024
Location: 江夏黄鹤楼
上城Collection
PostPosted: 2011-08-08 05:08:37    Post subject: Reply with quote

我的“旧金山”写得也可以 Cool
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白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2011-08-08 18:43:01    Post subject: Reply with quote

折断弓和箭
他们不再亲如兄弟
嘻哈着土语革命
同志自由

Wink
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上城
进士出身


Joined: 15 Mar 2007
Posts: 2024
Location: 江夏黄鹤楼
上城Collection
PostPosted: 2011-08-11 21:45:58    Post subject: Reply with quote

白水 Moonlight wrote:
折断弓和箭
他们不再亲如兄弟
嘻哈着土语革命
同志自由

Wink


我觉得这几句写得最传神。其它的两段稍嫌生硬(还没想好怎么改)。

祝白水秋安。
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