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"HuaHe Cup" 2007 Chinese Mainland and Oversea Poetry Competition and Non-governmental Magazines and Newspapers Joint Exhibition starts on the first day of 2007.
  
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苏幕遮 醉梦和范仲淹
渔樵耕读
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Joined: 12 Mar 2007
Posts: 116
Location: 中国湖南长沙
渔樵耕读Collection
PostPosted: 2007-03-13 08:45:02    Post subject: 苏幕遮 醉梦和范仲淹 Reply with quote

苏幕遮 醉梦和范仲淹


晓寒深,人疲倦,秋意愁人,人在栏边醉。

横卧塌头和衣睡,杯盘狼籍,更无人照看。

鼾声起,梦魂惊,漫漫云天,游荡长空酹。

酒和嫦娥舞步盈,曲终人醒,犹自翩翩袂。

20060925

苏幕遮(元玉)

碧云天,黄叶地,秋色连波,波上寒烟翠。

山映斜阳天接水,芳草无情,更在斜阳外。

黯乡魂,追旅思,夜夜除非,好梦留人睡。

明月楼高休独倚,酒入愁肠,化作相思泪。
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暗香如沁
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Joined: 14 Jan 2007
Posts: 885
Location: 北京
暗香如沁Collection
PostPosted: 2007-03-18 20:05:21    Post subject: Reply with quote

欣赏。希望下次在格律上会有所进步。
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渔樵耕读
秀才


Joined: 12 Mar 2007
Posts: 116
Location: 中国湖南长沙
渔樵耕读Collection
PostPosted: 2007-03-19 17:13:06    Post subject: Reply with quote

暗香如沁 wrote:
欣赏。希望下次在格律上会有所进步。
谢谢阁下的鼓励!在下写诗填词有时候凭的是兴趣,兴之所至,拈来便写,确实没怎么考究,可是事过之后再去修改,却也很难,希望以后能更好,这也是我自己所着力追求的!
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