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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌

无题(请诗友参与修改)

慈林
秀才

Joined: 20 Dec 2008
Posts: 419
Location: 洛杉矶
慈林Collection

Posted: 2010-08-13 18:37:48 Post subject: 无题(请诗友参与修改)

无题(请诗友参与修改) 海与岸之间浪在咆哮天与地之间电在闪耀纸与笔之间字在裸跑我与她之间情在燃烧浪在咆哮作粉身碎骨宣告电在闪耀演死亡之前舞蹈字在裸跑为一无所有呼号情在燃烧是灰飞烟灭寂廖 1, 此诗刚写好, 想不出一个贴切的题目, 请诗友们帮想想. 2, 最后一行的〝是〞, 这里应是动词, 也请诗友们改改. 3, 有二句诗, 我自认不错, 请诗友猜猜是哪二句.

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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌

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