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青海湖赏析张后诗歌《少女开成花朵》
张后
童生


Joined: 19 Jun 2006
Posts: 22
Location: 北京
张后Collection
PostPosted: 2010-06-06 22:29:38    Post subject: 青海湖赏析张后诗歌《少女开成花朵》 Reply with quote

少女开成花朵

一到冬天我的脸庞就长满了蓑草
风迎面吹来,把羊群吹到山上

少女从暖窖的花茎中醒来
像母亲一样把我抱在怀里

我触摸少女光滑的皮肤
听见她开成花朵的声音

【青海湖赏析】
张后善于写情诗,并且是写情诗的高手,这人所皆知。他不同于那些情绪汪洋思念成河者,要么一旦倾泻便滔滔不绝,要么悒郁悲怀深闺轻叹,或者光喊口号不见动静,光打雷不见下雨。读者读了没感觉,既不打动人又无艺术美感。张后的情诗,情绪上克制并不恣意,情感饱满却不外泻。在他的巧妙构思下,一切看起来那么自然不露痕迹,一切又都把心思隐约袒露出来,读者也被他带进了诗歌营造的氛围中。这首诗,只有短短六行,勾勒的意境和所呈现出来的情趣都很美,想象力丰富,回味空间很大。

“一到冬天我的脸庞就长满了蓑草/风迎面吹来,把羊群吹到山上”,这两句既交待时间概念,又推出场景,冬天,衰草,风,山坡,羊群,这些意象叠加所渲染出来的荒凉冷寂气氛,与下面少女“从花茎中醒来”,并且“像母亲一样把我抱在怀里”,形成了强烈反差,通过前后对比,凸显出少女如花之美,如火之美,圣洁之美,天籁之美。这里作者运用通感手法,从少女的形、色、声、暖、滑等形状、触觉、色觉、感觉的相互转接,到 “醒来”、“拥抱”、“触摸”、“盛开”等一系列动作,把少女从有了自身美的意识发现到盛开这个过程写得有血有肉,可触可感。诗歌物我一体,情景交融,除了具有传统诗歌的意境美,还有画面感和空间感,这些光电声色的艺术手段共同作用,打造了一个如花少女的艺术形象,给人美的享受。

美中不足的是,首段中出现的“风”、“羊群”,“山坡”等意象,虽然起了营造环境作用,但在与后面内容即主题性意象的衔接上仍有脱节或不甚自然之感。但瑕不掩玉,此诗仍不失为一首好诗。
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http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1226678603#feeds_FEEDS_1226678603张后鱼皮果
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山城子
榜眼


Joined: 23 May 2007
Posts: 4771
Location: 中国贵州
山城子Collection
PostPosted: 2010-06-07 23:25:03    Post subject: Reply with quote

喜欢张厚的爱情诗!!!
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诗是人生的雅伴儿。
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杨光
秀才


Joined: 01 Jun 2006
Posts: 683

杨光Collection
PostPosted: 2010-06-17 18:24:51    Post subject: Reply with quote

我触摸少女光滑的皮肤
听见她开成花朵的声音
精彩!
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