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再咏清秋(自度曲)
米运刚
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Joined: 19 Mar 2009
Posts: 918
Location: 四川省德阳市
米运刚Collection
PostPosted: 2009-09-30 03:32:41    Post subject: 再咏清秋(自度曲) Reply with quote

再咏清秋
落叶知秋,退却浓妆见黄眸,把酒漫步风正好,危楼,一抹淡雾掠胸愁。
前晌水榭遇故旧,芳菲甸尾戏清流。沉沉思绪似腊酒,银瓯,血燃六腑内,情沸东坡头。
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白云闲人
探花


Joined: 26 Aug 2007
Posts: 3466

白云闲人Collection
PostPosted: 2009-09-30 07:51:03    Post subject: Reply with quote

遇故友,戏清流,一曲浓墨谊深厚!
看! 运刚你用到"血燃"兼"情沸",可见你与故旧,谊非浅,似烈酒!
运刚,我有一点不明之處: 为何你却用了"危楼"与"胸愁"呢? 可否一释!
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诗中岁月,
笛里关山.
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冰清
同进士出身


Joined: 29 Mar 2007
Posts: 1921

冰清Collection
PostPosted: 2009-09-30 08:36:18    Post subject: Reply with quote

殷殷切切,思绪沉沉,读来令人动情。
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白云闲人
探花


Joined: 26 Aug 2007
Posts: 3466

白云闲人Collection
PostPosted: 2009-09-30 10:11:36    Post subject: Reply with quote

运刚,从这一段時期之诗文交流中,深深感受到: 你的思维很敏捷,筆锋锐利,词简意深,诗里才气纵横!
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诗中岁月,
笛里关山.
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米运刚
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Joined: 19 Mar 2009
Posts: 918
Location: 四川省德阳市
米运刚Collection
PostPosted: 2009-09-30 14:52:27    Post subject: Reply with quote

白云兄,夸奖了。在北美枫,看到了白云兄、听云先生、白水、海南丢、黄洋界先生、王君明、司马策风等大批行家的诗词,自己自愧弗如
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米运刚
秀才


Joined: 19 Mar 2009
Posts: 918
Location: 四川省德阳市
米运刚Collection
PostPosted: 2009-09-30 15:08:03    Post subject: Reply with quote

读了兄等的大作,真的受益匪浅。“危楼”是高楼之意,心中有些烦恼,登上高楼,“胸愁”自然就出来了。但,清新的秋风秋雾一漾,“胸愁”也被掠去了。谢谢白云兄品评。祝兄中秋佳节吉祥如意、阖家欢乐!
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白云闲人
探花


Joined: 26 Aug 2007
Posts: 3466

白云闲人Collection
PostPosted: 2009-10-01 06:27:50    Post subject: Reply with quote

谢运刚详释,坛智受益!
运刚不用客气,诗詞逸言表,风华行里间!
祝中秋快乐!
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诗中岁月,
笛里关山.
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William Zhou周道模
探花


Joined: 10 Jun 2007
Posts: 3950
Location: 中国四川广汉
William Zhou周道模Collection
PostPosted: 2009-10-02 12:52:45    Post subject: Reply with quote

我读出了“甜蜜的忧愁”之意啊!梦中的那位?
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诗歌是灵魂的歌唱.
周道模
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米运刚
秀才


Joined: 19 Mar 2009
Posts: 918
Location: 四川省德阳市
米运刚Collection
PostPosted: 2009-10-04 00:25:16    Post subject: Reply with quote

谢谢白云、冰清、道模三位诗友品评阅读。道模兄见笑了,“梦中的那位”依然在梦中。
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刘献琛
童生


Joined: 03 Sep 2009
Posts: 36

刘献琛Collection
PostPosted: 2009-10-06 21:54:11    Post subject: Reply with quote

自度妙曲别有兴味。大赏!问好!
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又一方天
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Joined: 16 Nov 2006
Posts: 385

又一方天Collection
PostPosted: 2009-10-07 16:58:42    Post subject: Reply with quote

赞赏“血燃六腑内,情沸东坡头。”
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空钩久垂
钓得
烟波月醉
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米运刚
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Joined: 19 Mar 2009
Posts: 918
Location: 四川省德阳市
米运刚Collection
PostPosted: 2009-10-09 03:57:41    Post subject: Reply with quote

谢谢刘兄、又一方天兄雅评!
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