Lake 举人
注册时间: 2007-01-09 帖子: 1286
Lake北美枫文集 |
发表于: 2009-05-29 05:17:38 发表主题: Under the Ruins |
|
|
Under the Ruins
Life waits inside us for a spark to be struck.
Life is a new bud atop an old branch.
Life is ceaseless as waves chase seabirds.
Life is that sleeping, plump infant
trapped in the debris from an 8.0-magnitude
earthquake. He sucks in milk and blood
from his mother’s nipples, breathing
in a narrow space, arched by flesh and bones.
It is May, a time of May flowers and Mother’s day.
In the rocking arms of a rescuer, he stares, smiles
around, trying to make out who these strangers are.
Life shines in his curious eyes.
(Changed L1 and L3 from "Life waits inside us like a spark struck from flint." and "Life is ceaseless as streams running towards the sea.") _________________ the trouble with poetry is that it encourages the writing of more poetry -- Billy Collins |
|
返页首 |
|
|
|
|
kino 秀才
注册时间: 2006-12-23 帖子: 411 来自: beijing kino北美枫文集 |
发表于: 2009-05-30 17:03:19 发表主题: |
|
|
we should learn to be strong although life is but suffering (quoting the latin motto "Vita humana est supplicium"). |
|
返页首 |
|
|
|
|
Lake 举人
注册时间: 2007-01-09 帖子: 1286
Lake北美枫文集 |
发表于: 2009-06-01 16:46:18 发表主题: |
|
|
Life is beautiful, unless one's life is hell. _________________ the trouble with poetry is that it encourages the writing of more poetry -- Billy Collins |
|
返页首 |
|
|
|
|
justjust 童生
注册时间: 2009-03-13 帖子: 13
justjust北美枫文集 |
发表于: 2009-06-03 20:14:21 发表主题: |
|
|
very good poem. the first line kind of eludes me. can a spark struck from flint wait? |
|
返页首 |
|
|
|
|
Lake 举人
注册时间: 2007-01-09 帖子: 1286
Lake北美枫文集 |
发表于: 2009-06-11 05:46:35 发表主题: |
|
|
Thank you justjust for your question.
I have it revised. See how it sounds now.
Thanks.
Lake _________________ the trouble with poetry is that it encourages the writing of more poetry -- Billy Collins |
|
返页首 |
|
|
|
|
宁家珍 秀才
注册时间: 2009-05-20 帖子: 470 来自: 中国黄山 宁家珍北美枫文集 |
发表于: 2009-06-11 20:07:05 发表主题: |
|
|
It's a very good poem and I like reading it . I have to learn from you . |
|
返页首 |
|
|
|
|
justjust 童生
注册时间: 2009-03-13 帖子: 13
justjust北美枫文集 |
发表于: 2009-07-08 14:29:32 发表主题: |
|
|
Lake 写到: |
Life waits inside us for a spark to be struck.
Life is a new bud atop an old branch.
Life is ceaseless as waves chase seabirds.
Life is that sleeping, plump infant
|
rhetorically i prefer something like this (though probably not semantically sound) :
life is a bright spark in a dark night
life is a new bud atop an old branch
life is a ceaseless wave in the boundless sea
life is that sleeping, plump infant |
|
返页首 |
|
|
|
|
Lake 举人
注册时间: 2007-01-09 帖子: 1286
Lake北美枫文集 |
发表于: 2009-07-17 04:29:50 发表主题: |
|
|
Thanks, just, for coming back to it. I see your point, rhetorically. I was thinking to do it a bit differently, with some minor variations.
Thanks again. _________________ the trouble with poetry is that it encourages the writing of more poetry -- Billy Collins |
|
返页首 |
|
|
|
|
|