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太阳花
lingquan.yang
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Joined: 29 Mar 2009
Posts: 70
Location: 中国云南
lingquan.yangCollection
PostPosted: 2009-04-04 00:07:42    Post subject: 太阳花 Reply with quote

让我用一千柄橙红的粉红的鲜红的刀
环绕你一千颗黑玫瑰的金黄的红宝石的蕊

我们在风中的舞姿
没有历史没有终结没有末日审判
即使时空都毁坏了
我也会同你紧握住深冬僵冷的大地
我们赤裸的杆和叶的绿
并不认同生物课里的真理
亲爱的,让我用一千柄橙红的粉红的鲜红的刀
环绕你一千颗黑玫瑰的金黄的红宝石的蕊

就是风也惊恐地啸叫
我们跳跃在茎秆上的舞姿
没有文字没有雕刻的线条没有易朽腐的纸页
即使人性即使兽性都丧失殆尽
我也会同你活在绿色的血液里
我们赤裸的杆和叶的绿
并不认同诗歌里的爱情

亲爱的我们不要相信人的语言
亲爱的我们也不要创造语言
更不要发出声音来表露心底的话
只要让我用一千柄橙红的粉红的鲜红的刀
环绕你一千颗黑玫瑰的金黄的红宝石的蕊
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nobody
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Joined: 31 Dec 2006
Posts: 2651
Location: Madtown
nobodyCollection
PostPosted: 2009-04-05 11:58:07    Post subject: Reply with quote

刚看完短句式的流水的行板,又来长的。哈哈。风格多变。不过不如那个好。
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白水
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Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2009-04-05 12:38:04    Post subject: Reply with quote

就是风也惊恐地啸叫
我们跳跃在茎秆上的舞姿
没有文字没有雕刻的线条没有易朽腐的纸页

有活力的诗行. 欣赏
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lingquan.yang
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Joined: 29 Mar 2009
Posts: 70
Location: 中国云南
lingquan.yangCollection
PostPosted: 2009-04-05 17:17:28    Post subject: Reply with quote

nobody wrote:
刚看完短句式的流水的行板,又来长的。哈哈。风格多变。不过不如那个好。



王嫱西施各有各的好,短的那个即兴,这个写得有点热血,当时正热恋着哪!却又担心了她被虐待,我是柏拉图式的,他们却未必是。问好!
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lingquan.yang
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Joined: 29 Mar 2009
Posts: 70
Location: 中国云南
lingquan.yangCollection
PostPosted: 2009-04-05 17:19:35    Post subject: Reply with quote

白水 Moonlight wrote:
就是风也惊恐地啸叫
...



你好!谢谢你的点评!多指导!
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