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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌

杯子

时东兵
举人

Joined: 23 Dec 2006
Posts: 1183
Location: 中国上海
时东兵Collection

Posted: 2009-01-20 20:07:01 Post subject: 杯子

杯子这只杯子是我的宠物随时在我的左右我在写诗时散发着咖啡的浓香诗便浸透了苦涩我在上课时她是一杯龙井茶品味诗的优劣她还是我的道具像拧开盖子一样去打开僵硬的头脑我们成了恋人每天不知要吻多少遍创作难免激情高涨血压升高她又是降压的三七茶清爽的苦瓜茶有时熬夜她还是提神的西洋参茶她跟着我喝够了酸甜苦辣她是一位大众情人模样俊俏得人见人爱人人都想品尝味道好极了！欢迎光临时东兵的博客：http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1246222181

白水
大学士

Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection

Posted: 2009-01-22 14:06:24 Post subject:

新颖的内涵. 如果换个写法, 比如不开门见"杯"或许更留相象空间. 己见, 不妥见谅.

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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌

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