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"HuaHe Cup" 2007 Chinese Mainland and Oversea Poetry Competition and Non-governmental Magazines and Newspapers Joint Exhibition starts on the first day of 2007. 		  
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秋分
雨时
童生


Joined: 25 Apr 2008
Posts: 78

雨时Collection
PostPosted: 2008-09-22 03:44:57    Post subject: 秋分 Reply with quote
西关桥外楼千尺，落叶敲窗不忍听。
梦里此身谁与共，一轮明月满城星。
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不亦悦乎
童生


Joined: 02 Apr 2007
Posts: 40

不亦悦乎Collection
PostPosted: 2008-09-24 07:07:38    Post subject: Reply with quote
乍看觉得“一轮明月满城星”与“落叶敲窗不忍听”不相符，再念才感到作者的心情。
这起承转结非常好，真是好诗！
愿作者早日脱离惆怅的心情。
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雨时
童生


Joined: 25 Apr 2008
Posts: 78

雨时Collection
PostPosted: 2008-09-26 05:33:50    Post subject: Reply with quote
看了不亦悦乎君的回帖，心情好多了。欢迎常来指教。问好！
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