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夏之雨夜(两首)
风的声音
童生


Joined: 01 Jun 2008
Posts: 64

风的声音Collection
PostPosted: 2008-07-22 04:14:45    Post subject: 夏之雨夜(两首) Reply with quote

一.

夜踩着细碎的步子
走进雨里
陷入,一片迷离
雨声喧哗却又宁静

谁,在此刻上路
去和秋天提前约会
是失落的人儿
或是他的心

渐行渐远,雨渐停
月亮又露出了笑容
月光照在小路上
只见一行足迹,身入了岁月

二.

早已忘怀约会的滋味
我们置身于同一个雨夜
呼吸

无语,你我的心在急促地跳
“咚咚,咚咚,咚咚”
外面的雨也滴嗒作响

心雨相合——
一声,一声,一生

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白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2008-07-22 15:46:54    Post subject: Reply with quote

心雨相合——
一声,一声,一生
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赵福治
探花


Joined: 30 May 2006
Posts: 3456
Location: 中国北京
赵福治Collection
PostPosted: 2008-07-23 05:19:44    Post subject: Reply with quote

心雨相合——
一声,一声,一生
____结尾不错.
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沙漠
秀才


Joined: 26 Jan 2007
Posts: 977
Location: 中国温州
沙漠Collection
PostPosted: 2008-07-23 05:44:13    Post subject: Reply with quote

只见一行足迹,身入了岁月

很具诗意!
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风的声音
童生


Joined: 01 Jun 2008
Posts: 64

风的声音Collection
PostPosted: 2008-07-27 05:01:37    Post subject: Reply with quote

白水 Moonlight wrote:
心雨相合——
一声,一声,一生

问好白斑,请多指点!
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风的声音
童生


Joined: 01 Jun 2008
Posts: 64

风的声音Collection
PostPosted: 2008-07-27 05:02:28    Post subject: Reply with quote

赵福治 wrote:
心雨相合——
一声,一声,一生
____结尾不错.

问好赵老师,请多指点!
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风的声音
童生


Joined: 01 Jun 2008
Posts: 64

风的声音Collection
PostPosted: 2008-07-27 05:03:00    Post subject: Reply with quote

沙漠 wrote:
只见一行足迹,身入了岁月

很具诗意!

问好沙斑,请多指点!
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子花
秀才


Joined: 08 Mar 2007
Posts: 722

子花Collection
PostPosted: 2008-07-27 17:35:53    Post subject: Reply with quote

有意境!!
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