Maple Review :: View topic - 《牧童》

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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌

《牧童》

风度飘飘
秀才

Joined: 28 May 2008
Posts: 100

风度飘飘Collection

Posted: 2008-06-27 05:15:25 Post subject: 《牧童》

《牧童》　　　　夕阳下，放学的孩子　　在林边的草地上，放牧家里的　　牛羊，炊烟升起的时候　　晚霞，染红了溪水的粼粼波光　　　　妈妈准备的晚饭，就摆在　　院里的石桌上，土豆，茄子　　还有自己家的大酱，虽不算丰盛　　但也吃的很饱，很香　　　　做完作业，可以看会儿电视　　就一个频道，总播什么油价上涨　　国外粮食紧张，还有股市的　　一路下降，房价的死抗　　　　这些都不明白，小孩子　　打了个哈嚏，很快就进入了　　梦乡，回到了那片草地上　　手里依然牵着他的牛羊 _________________ http://blog.sina.com.cn/fdpp

William Zhou周道模
探花

Joined: 10 Jun 2007
Posts: 3950
Location: 中国四川广汉
William Zhou周道模Collection

Posted: 2008-06-27 14:22:38 Post subject:

白描写实手法，缺点是诗语缺乏诗意。 _________________ 诗歌是灵魂的歌唱. 周道模

风度飘飘
秀才

Joined: 28 May 2008
Posts: 100

风度飘飘Collection

Posted: 2008-06-27 14:29:40 Post subject:

我的诗意可能就在于，三、四节的对比。 _________________ http://blog.sina.com.cn/fdpp

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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌

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