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橱窗里的模特 
替玫瑰哭泣
童生


Joined: 13 Jan 2008
Posts: 22

替玫瑰哭泣Collection
PostPosted: 2008-01-14 20:00:01    Post subject: 橱窗里的模特  Reply with quote

橱窗里的模特   

文 / 南方

你空洞的双眼
写满整个城市的欲望
你一动也不动的站在里面
每天,无数陌生人与你檫肩

你和他们之间
一层透明的玻璃
就是两个世界
距离很近却又遥远
从一个城市到另一个城市
从一个橱窗到另一个橱窗
街上行人匆匆
整个城市的脚步匆匆
两个世界,相同的孤独
比你眼神更寂寞的是
行人的脚步

那一层透明的玻璃
其实,映在上面的是
行人自己
……
两个世界,相同的孤独


07年10月1日—2日
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黑夜低喃着睡梦/也许,我所寻求的/不过是诗一般的碎迷/而我无法忘怀的/是那——— 拥你于怀的无语
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nobody
进士出身


Joined: 31 Dec 2006
Posts: 2651
Location: Madtown
nobodyCollection
PostPosted: 2008-01-15 04:36:20    Post subject: Reply with quote

构思明白了,最后差把劲 Laughing
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I'm nobody! Who are you?
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白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2008-01-15 05:26:23    Post subject: Reply with quote

很巧的构思
有点留白会更好

欢迎新朋友
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迪拜
同进士出身


Joined: 31 Oct 2006
Posts: 1588

迪拜Collection
PostPosted: 2008-01-15 18:14:00    Post subject: Reply with quote

再打磨
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博弈
榜眼


Joined: 21 Dec 2006
Posts: 4381
Location: SFO
博弈Collection
PostPosted: 2008-01-15 20:33:41    Post subject: Reply with quote

题目不错。
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(在不斷的審醜裡終將建立起新的審美)
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