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收到一条短信,说你还在流浪......(外二首)
邵鹏飞
童生


Joined: 21 Oct 2007
Posts: 25

邵鹏飞Collection
PostPosted: 2008-01-07 22:21:41    Post subject: 收到一条短信,说你还在流浪......(外二首) Reply with quote

◎收到一条短信,说你还在流浪......
——给Y

诗/邵鹏飞

有大片的雪花被风吹落
你却一直飘在半空,拒绝靠岸
像断线的风筝,浪迹天涯
时光也就这样转瞬即逝——

多年以后的今天,当我收到这条陌生的短信
窗外的雪依然在下着,纷纷攘攘
我戴上眼镜,却怎么也看不到
你日渐消瘦的身影,有些东西想夺眶而逃

2008.01.08于烟台


◎睡莲
——致莫奈

诗/邵鹏飞

在枫丹白露,在巴比松森林地区
对景写生的日子是清苦的
没有女人和美酒琼浆
没有各抒己见,或争名夺利的
文化沙龙,一声干净的蛙鸣
便消解了你的种种欲望

在这里,在青草和流水之间
你需要静下心来
你需要化作一朵睡莲
“出淤泥而不染,濯青莲而不妖”
挣脱世俗与浮华
在月光和蛙鸣声中
寻找信仰,像寻找画笔下
一个未曾出现的意象
一个未曾谋面的自己

注:莫奈,画家,法国印象派大师,代表作有《睡莲》,《日出·印象》等。

2008.01.08于烟台。


◎女生公寓前的烟囱

诗/邵鹏飞

在太阳的左侧
每天抽三次烟
早晨 中午 傍晚
余下的时间——
安静
偶尔有鸟飞过

日复一日
年复一年
女生公寓前的烟囱
教会了她们
什么叫生活

2008.01.06于烟台
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迪拜
同进士出身


Joined: 31 Oct 2006
Posts: 1588

迪拜Collection
PostPosted: 2008-01-08 12:24:56    Post subject: Reply with quote

很号的诗歌
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nobody
进士出身


Joined: 31 Dec 2006
Posts: 2651
Location: Madtown
nobodyCollection
PostPosted: 2008-01-08 17:19:55    Post subject: Reply with quote

收到一条短信,说你还在流浪

题目本身就故事万千。
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杯中冲浪
进士出身


Joined: 29 Sep 2006
Posts: 2891
Location: 中国
杯中冲浪Collection
PostPosted: 2008-01-08 22:40:14    Post subject: Reply with quote

“出淤泥而不染,濯青莲而不妖”
很好,只是这一句感觉多余。
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半溪明月
榜眼


Joined: 30 Sep 2006
Posts: 4760

半溪明月Collection
PostPosted: 2008-01-09 00:03:11    Post subject: Reply with quote

前两首不错,后一首不太明白!
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nobody
进士出身


Joined: 31 Dec 2006
Posts: 2651
Location: Madtown
nobodyCollection
PostPosted: 2008-01-09 00:42:53    Post subject: Reply with quote

[quote="半溪明月"]前两首不错,后一首不太明白![/quote]

哈哈,可能是,她们将来的生活就是一天做三顿饭,外加寂寞。 Laughing
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詩盜喜裸評
进士出身


Joined: 15 May 2007
Posts: 2984
Location: 台湾,台北
詩盜喜裸評Collection
PostPosted: 2008-01-10 04:42:43    Post subject: Reply with quote

有大片的雪花被風吹落
你卻一直飄在半空,拒絕靠岸
像斷線的風箏,浪跡天涯
時光也就這樣轉瞬即逝——

多年以後的今天,當我收到這條陌生的短信
窗外的雪依然在下著,紛紛攘攘
我戴上眼鏡,卻怎麼也看不到
你日漸消瘦的身影,有些東西想奪眶而逃


最後一句,沒能造成該有的效果!
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