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梦幻蜃楼咏
花月主人
童生


Joined: 03 Jan 2008
Posts: 4

花月主人Collection
PostPosted: 2008-01-03 11:03:35    Post subject: 梦幻蜃楼咏 Reply with quote

——春江体兼用花月体

花乡诗国论仄平,梦幻蜃楼月又生。
桂酒飘香蟾月里,仙窟作客百花明。
探寻花径游芳甸,河潮月夜流星霰。
拜月汲霞鹤已飞,烛泪擎花人何见?
菱花寂静染香尘,水月空灵缺半轮。
万里相思遥寄月,拈花默对梦中人。
啜露润花心未已,填词唤月神相似。
秋月缘何不待人?落花岂必随流水?
心域花魂意悠悠,穹庐月色染离愁。
醉月携风飘叶子,银花火树挂重楼。
花神入梦舞徘徊,凉月箫寒丹凤台。
借问月姊归何去?却遣风姨送花来。
花开花落孰相闻?月缺月圆似为君。
情托桂子月云度,墨凝花笺缱绻文。
银汉浮槎逐浪花,瑶池访月不还家。
月照琼瑶酒难尽,花转亭廊玉斗斜。
西风花怯关山雾,南国月冷潇湘路。
诗魂欲领月魂归,秋风无奈桂花树。
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花月主人
童生


Joined: 03 Jan 2008
Posts: 4

花月主人Collection
PostPosted: 2008-01-03 11:04:35    Post subject: Reply with quote

1、我在探讨,用花月体能否步春江花月夜写一首诗,弄了两个多点,终于算是成形了。

2、根据紫色菊的建议,诗名用:梦幻蜃楼咏。

3、诗的歌咏顺序按:花-月-月-花

4、我的这首诗,不算花月连珠体。唐寅的花月吟效连珠体,每句中有一个花字和一个月字。唐寅的《花月吟》是典型的花月吟效连珠体。

5、我的是每句,上句花,下句月,或者上句月,下句花。

6、唐寅的是花月连珠体,我的每一句里,分说花或月,暂定名为:花月串珠体。

7、春江体和花月体的百度词条是我创立的,月又生是我的百度百科笔名。
春江体:http://bk.baidu.com/view/934394.htm
花月体:http://bk.baidu.com/view/934356.htm
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hepingdao
Site Admin


Joined: 25 May 2006
Posts: 8106

hepingdaoCollection
PostPosted: 2008-01-03 11:09:49    Post subject: Reply with quote

真是难得
欢迎花月仙子
Very Happy
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晓松
举人


Joined: 26 Feb 2007
Posts: 1192

晓松Collection
PostPosted: 2008-01-03 16:12:47    Post subject: Reply with quote

好一首花月诗!
不写那——风花雪月,花前月下,闭月羞花,花容月貌,花好月圆;
却写出——菱花水月,花神月照,拜月擎花,花魂月色,花怯月冷。
非花月主人不能也~
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