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城市墓地 (转帖)
韩少君
进士出身


Joined: 06 Apr 2007
Posts: 2558
Location: 吉林四平
韩少君Collection
PostPosted: 2008-11-27 14:09:28    Post subject: 城市墓地 (转帖) Reply with quote

城市墓地

作者:明斯克

1
这是钢铁的墓地
它们埋葬了自己的子孙
汽车 马达和螺栓

这是橡胶的荒冢
轮胎长草

一望无际的白色垃圾
成为祭品
只有避孕工具
还能告诉你曾经有过
生命的活动

月亮是守墓人
墓地也将世代守望
我和妇女们

2
不用语言
谨以暗示为锐利武器
我将拥有更多的妇女

她们成为爱情的信徒
浪漫情怀的信徒

强大的老板和政客
已经吝啬温柔语言
只有我 丰富的词汇已成为
妇女们充饥的粮食

水面平静而洪大的词汇
让她们兴奋而紧张
让她们心灵震颤

让少妇都能产生更年期一样
绝望的紧迫感

她们爱我
纷纷奔往幸福的墓地

明斯克 :四平市一汽修厂老板。钱没少挣,养了一群女人。
唯一的积蓄是手下的几个高徒。口头禅----报废!
看书 写诗 不加入任何文学组织。信任胡锦涛,拥护温家宝。但对四平市委市政府却抱有极大怀疑。
(不愿公开姓名)
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靠才华为自己带来幸福的是才子;靠才华为自己带来痛苦的是诗人!!http://blog.sina.com.cn/hanshaojun345
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William Zhou周道模
探花


Joined: 10 Jun 2007
Posts: 3950
Location: 中国四川广汉
William Zhou周道模Collection
PostPosted: 2008-11-27 15:17:33    Post subject: Reply with quote

有钱的墓地,女人也向往啊!墓地也能长出诗歌的青草呢。
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诗歌是灵魂的歌唱.
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白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2008-11-27 17:32:25    Post subject: Reply with quote

少君, 照说这位文笔还行. 可读了你贴的简介, 乡亲们都怎么了? 晕 Shocked
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韩少君
进士出身


Joined: 06 Apr 2007
Posts: 2558
Location: 吉林四平
韩少君Collection
PostPosted: 2008-11-27 18:17:11    Post subject: Reply with quote

回白水 对简介不必当真 也许没有此人 也许大有人在 灌水而已

乡亲们为富不仁了-----
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nobody
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Joined: 31 Dec 2006
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PostPosted: 2008-11-28 17:09:16    Post subject: Reply with quote

漂亮有力的诗,欣赏。
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杨海军
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Joined: 01 Mar 2007
Posts: 2205
Location: 吉林
杨海军Collection
PostPosted: 2008-11-29 13:29:36    Post subject: Reply with quote

感 觉这诗是不是窄了些??表现的主题没有任何意义。另外,这样写是不是太低俗了,有些昏暗和无奈里面。这首诗透视出作者对社会的不满,尤其感 觉对女人的品性有污辱。
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走了很久了。还清晰地望见/身后那盏明灭的灯火/好像我们走的越久越远/故乡的那盏灯就越亮
——拙作《离开村庄》
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韩少君
进士出身


Joined: 06 Apr 2007
Posts: 2558
Location: 吉林四平
韩少君Collection
PostPosted: 2008-11-29 16:32:20    Post subject: Reply with quote

谢海军真诚直言:

我之所以转帖此诗 是因为它是诗歌的一种。无所谓主题。记住 什么叫百花齐放 就是土匪强盗嫖客妓女写的真是生活 也许更主题。你受共党文艺思想教育太深 极左孽根太长 不宜指导诗歌理论建设。但 你的诗歌本身可以 尤其语言和技巧都不错。

另外 文学的真实和生活的真实 有一定的差距和区别。再说 都像我这样 一个老婆 一个孩子 都活不起 那才是女人的悲哀

女人让人养否 取决于她们自己 这是信仰自由 生存方式自由

与我们无关。老板们愿意 有能力多养几个女人 这是他们的自由 是为党分忧 为国出力 为社会减轻负担 只可羡慕 不可嫉妒。

半真半假 勿嗔!
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娇娇
秀才


Joined: 18 Nov 2008
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PostPosted: 2008-11-29 22:17:30    Post subject: Reply with quote

呵呵,城市墓地,这是一座新坟茔。躯壳与灵魂的分离。看到大家的辩论很有意思。俺也来
踩一脚。
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野航
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Joined: 23 Mar 2007
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Location: toronto
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PostPosted: 2008-11-30 12:45:58    Post subject: Reply with quote

此人当是个极有趣的,虽说就那么几句,见性情,有力度,特个性。
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回归自然 回归心灵 回归传统
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莞君
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PostPosted: 2008-12-01 00:44:57    Post subject: Reply with quote

语言很有穿透力 个性 有自己的东西 来学习 问好老师
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莞君
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汪抒
童生


Joined: 27 Jul 2008
Posts: 39

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PostPosted: 2008-12-01 23:14:40    Post subject: Reply with quote

喜欢这样的诗歌
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郭全华
秀才


Joined: 28 Feb 2007
Posts: 145

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PostPosted: 2008-12-02 03:30:20    Post subject: Reply with quote

欣赏
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借助诗歌,努力把自己活成一棵树,白天向上,夜里向下.
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韩少君
进士出身


Joined: 06 Apr 2007
Posts: 2558
Location: 吉林四平
韩少君Collection
PostPosted: 2008-12-03 03:24:34    Post subject: Reply with quote

谢 郭全华 汪抒 莞君 野航 娇娇 的鼓励。
并再谢杨海军!因为争鸣,也只能听到你不同的 宝贵的声音!虽然我没有同意你的看法,并进行了辩驳,但,无疑,你的声音是最可贵的。捍卫你的发言权。请继续!
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杨海军
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PostPosted: 2008-12-03 14:12:17    Post subject: Reply with quote

呵呵。我无言了。
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走了很久了。还清晰地望见/身后那盏明灭的灯火/好像我们走的越久越远/故乡的那盏灯就越亮
——拙作《离开村庄》
http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1269376751
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飞翔的夏天
童生


Joined: 09 Nov 2008
Posts: 42
Location: 中国石家庄
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PostPosted: 2008-12-03 18:10:34    Post subject: Reply with quote

不错的
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