Vienna (Que tout le monde doivent valser) 维也纳（一起来跳华尔兹）

[白水]

Vienna (Que tout le monde doivent valser)
Mitch Parry


This is the centre that cannot hold, axle
to the empire wheel. Ants swarming in the valley
of a lion's skull. All the racket of Babel
in the markets, the corners, coffee-houses--

but o, what polyglot thunder! What foment
& tumult! There's Kraus & his viper
tongue, pince-nez fogged from mourning
his lost actress. Sit near him


at Café Museum & you're trapped
for hours, torch of his gaze burning
into you the lost art of language. That slit
of a mouth, the lank curls plastered

to his forehead, ears like a boxer's. The twisted
fingers he flutters & stabs. Punctuation.
Sparrow ankles crossed under the table.
Loos is there beside him, eyes on what passes



the windows. Free while beautiful
mad Bessie, cake-walk queen
of England, is sunning at Lake Geneva.
Coughing blood into a blue bottle, she tumbles

out the window to go dancing with
any patients who can still breath. Madness!
When she returns, Adolf will greet
her at his house without eyebrows, avow himself

the prophet of severity. "Ornament
is crime," when what he means is that
beauty is thin, & young. & hairless. Bald
Kokoschka, paint-stained & haughty


drags all to the American Bar, onyx-
glass windows, Loos' creation. Buy one
drink & nurse it in the leather booths, tell them
Adolf sent you. Professional starvers
mooching slivovitz, whiskey, dregs
from your ashtray. For the price of a beer
they'll suck you off in the w.c. See who
has the stronger stomach, but careful


Freud & his dirty mind don't see. Jankowsky
with his syphilitic pipe, mind elegantly going
French, as they say. Or that sad-eyed
hunchback Christomanos, reader


to the Empress & still twitching from her
assassination. Buy him a drink, give him
a smoke. Pour your troubles into his massive
heart before the tourists & the whores


force us out to the streets. Out to the order
& decency, plumed hats & cravats, cobbles
shining with oil. Wander down to the edge
of the city, the river looping a ring


under bridges, past forests, the slow coil
drifting down to the tiny nameless
cemetery where the aborted
& the suicides sleep.



维也纳（一起来跳华尔兹）
作者/米奇•帕里 译文/和平岛, 白水

这是个难以约束的中心，
帝国车轮的轴线。蚂蚁汇集
于狮子颅骨的沟槽。各种杂闹的
集市，旮旯，咖啡屋。。。。。。

但是噢，多种语言的震撼！何等煽情
和骚动！这里是克劳斯和他毒蛇般的
舌头，夹鼻眼镜因失去女演员的
哀痛而模糊不清。坐在他身边

你沉浸于咖啡屋
数小时，他凝眸的火
灼伤着你，这失传的语言艺术。那干裂的
嘴，细长的卷发遮盖

着他的额头，拳击手似的耳朵。
他打着响指。标点。
小麻雀的脚爪从桌下穿过
洛斯就在他身边，注视着那些

从窗前掠过的。自由的美
疯狂的贝西，英格兰阔步舞之
皇后，在日内瓦湖畔沐浴着阳光
把血咳进一只蓝瓶子，她跌出

窗外去和任何还能呼吸的
病人跳舞。疯子!
当她回来，阿道夫将她迎进
他那没有窗帘的家，宣称自己

是个精准的预言家：“伪装
是罪过。” 他的意思是
美丽是浅薄的，年轻并且秃头，谢顶的
可可苏卡，拖着一身油污和傲慢

走进美国酒巴，彩嵌的
玻璃窗，是洛斯创作的。买一杯
饮料，在皮制的火车包座里慢慢享用，告诉他们
你是阿道夫派来的。习惯了饥饿

索取梅子白兰地，威士忌，你烟灰缸的
烟蒂。为了这瓶啤酒
他们在厕所拍你的马屁。看谁
的肚子受得了，但要小心了

佛洛伊德和他肮脏的思维可不认人。蒋库斯基
和他梅毒患者的烟斗，幽雅的法兰西
思维，如他们所说，那目光悲戚
又驼背的克里思托马诺斯，曾读书

给女皇听，为她被暗杀而抽泣
给他买一杯饮料，给他
一支烟。把你的苦恼一古脑全灌入他那博大的
心脏，别等观光客和妓女

把我们赶到大街。赶出常规
和体面，翎羽帽和领带。鹅卵石
闪着油渍光。漫步到城市
的边缘，河水打个圈

流经桥梁，穿过森林，慢慢地盘绕着
下到卑微无名的
公墓，在这儿，夭折者
和自杀者得以长眠。

[白水]

请朋友们探讨, 指正. 谢谢. 问好周末
这两句感觉有点别扭, 盼商榷:
For the price of a beer
they'll suck you off in the w.c.

pince-nez fogged from mourning
his lost actress.

[kino]

Vienna (Que tout le monde doivent valser)
维也纳（一起来跳华尔兹）

作者/米奇•帕里 译文/和平岛、白水

This is the centre that cannot hold, axle
to the empire wheel. Ants swarming in the valley
of a lion's skull. All the racket of Babel
in the markets, the corners, coffee-houses--
这是个难以约束的中心，是 [这个是字，或可删除，以保持简洁] 帝国车轮的轴承。蚂蚁汇集 【轴线——轴承？】于狮子颅骨的沟槽。各种杂闹的【沟槽——沟壑？Babel未译出，从下文看应该指圣经中的巴别塔。】 集市，旮旯，咖啡屋……

but o, what polyglot thunder! What foment
& tumult! There's Kraus & his viper
tongue, pince-nez fogged from mourning
his lost actress. Sit near him

但是噢，多种语言的震撼！何等煽情
和骚动！这里是克劳斯和他毒蛇般的
舌头，夹鼻眼镜的雾化来自失去女演员的 【雾化——模糊？】
哀痛。坐在他身边

at Café Museum & you're trapped
for hours, torch of his gaze burning
into you the lost art of language. That slit
of a mouth, the lank curls plastered
你沉浸于咖啡屋
数小时，他凝眸的火
灼伤你，这失传的语言艺术。那干裂的
嘴，细长的卷发遮盖

to his forehead, ears like a boxer's. The twisted
fingers he flutters & stabs. Punctuation.
Sparrow ankles crossed under the table.
Loos is there beside him, eyes on what passes
到他的额头，拳击家似的耳朵。那错乱的 【拳击手？错乱？这里好像是说打响指，拇指和中止一起弄出响声】
手指颤抖着戳动。标点。
小麻雀的脚爪从桌下穿过
洛斯就在他身边，眼睛看着（注视）那些

the windows. Free while beautiful
mad Bessie, cake-walk queen
of England, is sunning at Lake Geneva.
Coughing blood into a blue bottle, she tumbles
从窗前掠过的。自由的美
疯狂的贝西，英格兰阔步舞之
皇后，光照日内瓦湖 【光照还是在晒太阳？】
把血咳进一只蓝瓶子，她跌出

out the window to go dancing with
any patients who can still breath. Madness!
When she returns, Adolf will greet
her at his house without eyebrows, avow himself
窗外去和任何还能呼吸的
病人跳舞。疯子!
当她回来，阿道夫将她迎进
他那没有窗帘的家，宣称自己

the prophet of severity. "Ornament
is crime," when what he means is that
beauty is thin, & young. & hairless. Bald
Kokoschka, paint-stained & haughty
是个精准的预言家：“伪装
是犯罪。” 他的意思是 【伪装是不是妆扮？】
美丽是淡薄，和年轻并秃头，谢顶的
可可苏卡，拖着一身油污和傲慢

drags all to the American Bar, onyx-
glass windows, Loos' creation. Buy one
drink & nurse it in the leather booths, tell them
Adolf sent you. Professional starvers
迈入美国酒巴，彩嵌的 【酒吧？】
玻璃窗，是洛斯创作的。买一杯
饮料，在皮制的火车包座里慢慢享用，告诉他们
你是阿道夫派来的。惯于挨饿 [/color[color=red]]【职业饥饿者，starve是使……挨饿。有点糊涂。】
mooching slivovitz, whiskey, dregs
from your ashtray. For the price of a beer
they'll suck you off in the w.c. See who
has the stronger stomach, but careful
索取梅子白兰地，威士忌，你烟灰缸的
烟蒂。为了这瓶啤酒
他们在厕所拍你的马屁。看谁 【拍马屁我看可以，据我的理解比较污秽，但是这样翻译，或可联想到。呵呵】的肚子受得了，但要小心了

Freud & his dirty mind don't see. Jankowsky
with his syphilitic pipe, mind elegantly going
French, as they say. Or that sad-eyed
hunchback Christomanos, reader
佛洛伊德和他肮脏思维可不认人。蒋库斯基
和他梅毒患者的烟斗，幽雅的法兰西
思维，如他们所说，那目光悲戚
又驼背的克里思托马诺斯，曾读书

to the Empress & still twitching from her
assassination. Buy him a drink, give him
a smoke. Pour your troubles into his massive
heart before the tourists & the whores
给女皇听，为她被暗杀而抽泣
给他买一杯饮料，给他
一支烟。把你的苦恼一古脑全灌入他那博大的
心脏，别等观光客和妓女

force us out to the streets. Out to the order
& decency, plumed hats & cravats, cobbles
shining with oil. Wander down to the edge
of the city, the river looping a ring

把我们推到大街。推出常规 【推改为赶如何？事实上他们来了我们自己走了。】和体面，翎羽帽和领带。鹅卵石
闪着油渍光。漫步到城市
的边缘，河水打个圈

under bridges, past forests, the slow coil
drifting down to the tiny nameless
cemetery where the aborted
& the suicides sleep.
流过桥梁，过了森林，慢慢地盘绕着 【穿越森林？】
下到卑微无名的
公墓，在这儿，夭折者
和自杀者得以长眠。


————————————
很有历史感的诗，如果我是欧洲人，可能感触更深刻一点。[/quote]

[白水]

谢谢你KINO, 有些建议特好. 另, 看到你提到拍马屁的联想, 我想到了啤酒, 有人把啤酒叫什么来着
不开玩笑了, 盼你们再细看看, 关键是内容得译准. 文字的推敲就可以最后一气喝成了.
另:你提出(各种杂闹的【沟槽——沟壑？Babel未译出，从下文看应该指圣经中的巴别塔。】 )
我原本和你想法一样, PEACE提出不同见解, 等他想想再定吧. 问好

[博弈]

my view here about the original text;
names mentioned here all need notes for readers,
if and when they are co-realted or extrapolated,
the meaning will make sense more.
for example;
Karl Kraus, a satirist
Aldof Loos, an architect
Bessie (Elizabeth)
(Peter) Jankowsky
(Oskar) Kokoschka
Freud, when referred to as the founder of psychoanalysis
etc.

and hunchback seems to refer to "The Hunchback of Notre Dame" translated version of "Notre-Dame de Paris"by Victor Hugo. but Christomanos, WHO??
some of these can only make sense to the writer in his own field of work, I believe.

the author seems quite an acquaintance of Austrian art & literature.

some of them simply don't make a pretty sense appearing here in one place(hey, it is a drama, you may argue), and some languages here are not poetic at all, "suck off," "syphilitic pipe, mind elegantly going
French", '&' used without self restraint and misplaced punctuations, a few. The starver and there on, slivovitz,dregs, and etc. all refer to the realm of liquor & bottle. i.e., the Chinese translation did not catch it.

the ending lines are nothing but a common repetition.


is he the instructor at

http://finearts.uvic.ca/writing/faculty/parry.html ?
I wonder why he wrote such (I mean isn't there a better way to dance?)

much work to be done still both in text and translation in my view. to be harsh, if I want to be harsh, you don't need to learn such type of poetry in Western Literature. It is repeating the past like new criticism but with a lower taste which is a problem they need to reslove themselves. Waltz (valser) is still an elegant European dance.
_________________
（在不斷的審醜裡終將建立起新的審美）

[白水]

thank you a lot, 博弈. i have learnt more from you. i will think all of this seriously and discuss with peace.
have a nice day.

[hepingdao]

这首诗比较难译

关于:
All the racket of Babel
in the markets, the corners, coffee-houses--

All the racket of Babel,应该是"markets, the corners, coffee-houses"的一种"东西",
是什么呢?
查一下字典:

racket: n. 球拍,喧闹纷乱

Babel:
1. a confusion of voices and other sounds
2. (Genesis 11:1-11) a tower built by Noah's descendants (probably in Babylon) who intended it to reach up to heaven; God foiled them by confusing their language so they could no longer understand one another

从这个语境看,
All the racket of Babel就是指声音嘈杂的意思
比如这句话:

A babel of voices could be heard from the street.
可以听见街上一阵噪囔的声音。

如果翻译成"巴别塔",
那译文就成了
"集市，旮旯和咖啡屋的巴别塔式的喧闹纷乱"
反而很别扭
_________________
为网友服务: 端茶倒水勤打扫!

[hepingdao]

KINO的很多具体建议都很好

就这样吧,这诗歌确实让人读来别扭,不想再花时间了

_________________
为网友服务: 端茶倒水勤打扫!

[白水]

维也纳（一起来跳华尔兹）
作者/米奇•帕里 译文/和平岛, 白水

这是个难以约束的中心，
帝国车轮的轴线。蚂蚁汇集
于狮子颅骨的沟壑。巴別塔喧闹的
集市，旮旯，咖啡屋。。。。。。

但是噢，多种语言的震撼！何等煽情
和骚动！这里是克劳斯和他毒蛇般的
舌头，夹鼻眼镜因失去女演员的
哀痛而模糊。坐在他身边

你沉浸于咖啡屋
数小时，他凝眸的火
灼伤着你，这失传的语言艺术。那干裂的
嘴，细长的卷发遮盖

着他的额头，拳击手似的耳朵。
他打着响指。骤停。
小麻雀的脚爪从桌下穿过
洛斯就在他身边，注视着那些

从窗前掠过的。自由的美
疯狂的贝西，英格兰阔步舞之
皇后，在日内瓦湖畔沐浴着阳光
把血咳进一只蓝瓶子，她跌出

窗外去和任何还能呼吸的
病人跳舞。疯子!
当她回来，阿道夫将她迎进
他那没有窗帘的家，宣称自己

是个精准的预言家：“伪装
是罪过。” 他的意思是
美丽是浅薄的，年轻并且秃头，谢顶的
可可苏卡，拖着一身油污和傲慢

走进美国酒巴，彩嵌的
玻璃窗，是洛斯创作的。买一杯
饮料，在皮制的火车包座里慢慢享用，告诉他们
你是阿道夫派来的。习惯了饥饿

索取梅子白兰地，威士忌，你烟灰缸的
烟蒂。为了这瓶啤酒
他们在厕所拍你的马屁。看谁
的肚子受得了，但要小心了

佛洛伊德和他肮脏的思维可不认人。蒋库斯基
和他梅毒患者的烟斗，幽雅的法兰西
思维，如他们所说，那目光悲戚
又驼背的克里思托马诺斯，曾读书

给女皇听，为她被暗杀而抽泣
给他买一杯饮料，给他
一支烟。把你的苦恼一古脑全灌入他那博大的
心脏，别等观光客和妓女

把我们赶到大街。赶出阶层
和体面，翎羽帽和领带。鹅卵石
闪着油渍光。漫步到城市
的边缘，河水打个圈

流经桥梁，穿过森林，缓旋而下流向
卑微无名的
公墓，在这儿，夭折者
和自杀者得以长眠。

Vienna (Que tout le monde doivent valser)
Mitch Parry


This is the centre that cannot hold, axle
to the empire wheel. Ants swarming in the valley
of a lion's skull. All the racket of Babel
in the markets, the corners, coffee-houses--

but o, what polyglot thunder! What foment
& tumult! There's Kraus & his viper
tongue, pince-nez fogged from mourning
his lost actress. Sit near him


at Café Museum & you're trapped
for hours, torch of his gaze burning
into you the lost art of language. That slit
of a mouth, the lank curls plastered

to his forehead, ears like a boxer's. The twisted
fingers he flutters & stabs. Punctuation.
Sparrow ankles crossed under the table.
Loos is there beside him, eyes on what passes



the windows. Free while beautiful
mad Bessie, cake-walk queen
of England, is sunning at Lake Geneva.
Coughing blood into a blue bottle, she tumbles

out the window to go dancing with
any patients who can still breath. Madness!
When she returns, Adolf will greet
her at his house without eyebrows, avow himself

the prophet of severity. "Ornament
is crime," when what he means is that
beauty is thin, & young. & hairless. Bald
Kokoschka, paint-stained & haughty


drags all to the American Bar, onyx-
glass windows, Loos' creation. Buy one
drink & nurse it in the leather booths, tell them
Adolf sent you. Professional starvers
mooching slivovitz, whiskey, dregs
from your ashtray. For the price of a beer
they'll suck you off in the w.c. See who
has the stronger stomach, but careful


Freud & his dirty mind don't see. Jankowsky
with his syphilitic pipe, mind elegantly going
French, as they say. Or that sad-eyed
hunchback Christomanos, reader


to the Empress & still twitching from her
assassination. Buy him a drink, give him
a smoke. Pour your troubles into his massive
heart before the tourists & the whores


force us out to the streets. Out to the order
& decency, plumed hats & cravats, cobbles
shining with oil. Wander down to the edge
of the city, the river looping a ring


under bridges, past forests, the slow coil
drifting down to the tiny nameless
cemetery where the aborted
& the suicides sleep.

[白水]

巴別塔（也譯作巴貝爾塔），據《聖經》創世記第11章記載，是當時人類聯合起來興建，希望能通往天堂的高塔。為了阻止人類的計劃，上帝讓人類說不同的語言，使人類相互之間不能溝通，計劃因此失敗，人類自此各散東西。

目錄 [隱藏]
1 猶太─基督教的記錄
2 聖經以外的記錄
2.1 歷史
2.2 猶太教文獻
2.3 可蘭經
2.4 摩門經
3 現代的影響
4 參見
5 對外連結（英文）



[編輯] 猶太─基督教的記錄

Maciejowski Bible中對建築巴別塔的描述那時、天下人的口音言語、都是一樣。他們往東邊遷移的時候、在示拿地遇見一片平原、就住在那裏。他們彼此商量說、來吧、我們要作磚、把磚燒透了。他們就拿磚當石頭、又拿石漆當灰泥。他們說、來吧、我們要建造一座城、和一座塔、塔頂通天、為要傳揚我們的名、免得我們分散在全地上。耶和華降臨要看看世人所建造的城和塔。耶和華說、看哪、他們成為一樣的人民、都是一樣的言語、如今既作起這事來、以後他們所要作的事、就沒有不成就的了。我們下去、在那裏變亂他們的口音、使他們的言語、彼此不通。於是耶和華使他們從那裏分散在全地上。他們就停工、不造那城了。因為耶和華在那裏變亂天下人的言語、使眾人分散在全地上、所以那城名叫巴別。〔就是變亂的意思〕