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静物 STILL LIFE
非马
秀才


Joined: 22 Jun 2006
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PostPosted: 2008-07-15 12:29:17    Post subject: 静物 STILL LIFE Reply with quote

静物


白瓷观音
微笑着
看一粒尘埃
在晨光里
堕落



STILL LIFE


The Goddess of Mercy
of white porcelain
stands there with a smile
watching
in the bright morning light
a dust mote
fall
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William Zhou周道模
探花


Joined: 10 Jun 2007
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PostPosted: 2008-07-15 15:41:32    Post subject: Reply with quote

请教非马先生:

汉语的“堕落”是否改“坠落”好些?
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Lake
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PostPosted: 2008-07-15 16:00:37    Post subject: Reply with quote

Did Mr. Fei Ma use 堕落 on purpose? Smile
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非马
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非马Collection
PostPosted: 2008-07-15 17:45:44    Post subject: Reply with quote

谢谢道模和LAKE,我正在想,大概网络上出现的错别字太多了,所以没有人注意到我用“堕落”而非“坠落”。结果还是两位眼尖。而LAKE更是心尖,才会想到我可能是有意为之。
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William Zhou周道模
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PostPosted: 2008-07-16 00:53:58    Post subject: Reply with quote

窃以为:

“坠落”比“堕落”好:

1、与 fall 和睦,

2、堕落是读者“看”出诗意,直露了;坠落是读者“想”出诗意,含蓄些。
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Lake
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PostPosted: 2008-07-16 04:36:49    Post subject: Reply with quote

看到英文的好了吧。 Very Happy

一个 fall 可包含多种意思 :“坠落”, “堕落”, "倒塌" and "灭亡" etc....
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非马
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PostPosted: 2008-07-16 05:03:54    Post subject: Reply with quote

用"堕落"代替"坠落"多少有幽默的企图在内。还有,用“坠落”读者不可能联想到“堕落”,但用“堕落”则很自然地会想到“坠落”。一举两得甚至多得。何乐而不为? Smile
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William Zhou周道模
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PostPosted: 2008-07-16 05:36:04    Post subject: Reply with quote

查了下词典: fall 有“堕”的意思,没有看见“堕落”的意思。

我们看见落叶,能否说“树在腐败”?
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Lake
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PostPosted: 2008-07-16 06:01:14    Post subject: Reply with quote

查的什么字典啊,William? Smile

只看看附在 word 上的字典,就有如下解释:

1.落下
2.崩解
3.陷落
4.堕落
5.战死
6.衰退
....

etc.

这样看来,诗里的 dust 还具有象征意义.
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非马
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PostPosted: 2008-07-16 06:58:50    Post subject: Reply with quote

Lake wrote:
查的什么字典啊,William? Smile
这样看来,诗里的 dust 还具有象征意义.
...

在宇宙与"神"的眼里,我们可能连DUST都不如呢.
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博弈
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PostPosted: 2008-07-16 18:06:28    Post subject: Reply with quote

非马 wrote:
Lake wrote:
查的什么字典啊,William? Smile
这样看来,诗里的 dust 还具有象征意义.
...

在宇宙与"神"的眼里,我们可能连DUST都不如吧.


确实。感到这一首诗带了点神性(e,g, 西方的 fall of man, The Fall of Adam and Eve);
因尘字带起的禅性在此静物画面里;
带了先生的 幽默的以"微笑着"连接白瓷观音、尘埃上下两句。

fall 亦含堕落的意思,如上面的例子。东西方的某种神性在此相通。
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William Zhou周道模
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PostPosted: 2008-07-18 01:18:06    Post subject: san Reply with quote

深入地探讨和学习,谢三位大家!
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非马
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PostPosted: 2008-07-18 04:17:53    Post subject: Reply with quote

博弈 wrote:
非马 wrote:
Lake wrote:
查的什么字典啊,William? Smile
这样看来,诗里的 dust 还具有象征意义.
...

在宇宙与"神"的眼里,我们可能连DUST都不如吧.


确实。感到这一首诗带了点神性(e,g, 西方的 fall of man, The Fall of Adam and Eve);
...

问博弈好!谢谢加入讨论.
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