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三月的爱 (跟悠子学画葫)
是有缘
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Joined: 08 Feb 2008
Posts: 741

是有缘Collection
PostPosted: 2008-03-04 20:10:31    Post subject: 三月的爱 (跟悠子学画葫) Reply with quote

迎春花偷偷地盛开
仿佛在一个不经意的夜
沉睡了一个冬的气息
也悄悄地在阳光下舒展开
将冷冻的冰雪化解

春风吹过冬天里荒凉的田野
长出一片片嫩绿的蔬菜
湖边的扬柳
也诱惑地掀起了长长的裙摆
如美丽的少女跳起舞来

恢复了生机的枝头
默默地孕育着缤纷的七彩
多情的蜜蜂忘记了冬眠中长久的等待
在花丛里飞来忙去地乐开了怀
黄鹂鸟的歌声,婉转地说着爱


原玉:



三月 by 悠子

我知道,春天一定会来
雨后的柳青鹅黄
是我望眼了一冬的色彩
花的心扉一朵一朵的打开
千里外的冰雪,正悄悄融解

临水而立,看春风又渡
花香轻轻漫过烟雨
飘逝的光线穿越低垂的柳丝
岸边窈窕的身影
是谁的景致,若即若离

怎样才能,在桃花睡去之前
在某片绿叶的脉络里
和你相遇
递给你盛满春光的玉盏
告诉你,曾经流失的花语
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红袖添乱
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Joined: 09 Jan 2008
Posts: 778

红袖添乱Collection
PostPosted: 2008-03-04 20:45:45    Post subject: Reply with quote

有缘这首真是好和~~我喜欢
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梦的一端是我脉脉的凝视,
而另一端是你清澈的眼睛。
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是有缘
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Joined: 08 Feb 2008
Posts: 741

是有缘Collection
PostPosted: 2008-03-05 04:41:08    Post subject: Reply with quote

谢谢红袖喜欢。最近看到你老有新作,羡慕的紧。
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苏茉儿
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Joined: 31 Dec 2007
Posts: 739

苏茉儿Collection
PostPosted: 2008-03-05 08:38:32    Post subject: Reply with quote

洋洋洒洒,一路春之歌,结果真好看!
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默默无言处,盈盈一笑间。
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詩盜喜裸評
进士出身


Joined: 15 May 2007
Posts: 2984
Location: 台湾,台北
詩盜喜裸評Collection
PostPosted: 2008-03-05 11:50:49    Post subject: Reply with quote

迎春花开人人爱!
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可情可理,去捧就真
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悠子
举人


Joined: 04 Jan 2008
Posts: 1383
Location: US
悠子Collection
PostPosted: 2008-03-05 12:10:28    Post subject: Reply with quote

很春天的。
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呆哥的女人
童生


Joined: 02 Mar 2008
Posts: 20

呆哥的女人Collection
PostPosted: 2008-03-05 12:40:11    Post subject: Reply with quote

恕我直言,

是有缘君这首固然贴题扣图,但是感觉平淡了一些;景物有点散,抒情也不是很有感染力.好像没有什么点睛之笔.
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人称呆嫂
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詩盜喜裸評
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Joined: 15 May 2007
Posts: 2984
Location: 台湾,台北
詩盜喜裸評Collection
PostPosted: 2008-03-05 17:58:51    Post subject: 这段不错哪~ Reply with quote

诱惑地掀起了长长的裙摆
如美丽的少女跳起舞来
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可情可理,去捧就真
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是有缘
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Joined: 08 Feb 2008
Posts: 741

是有缘Collection
PostPosted: 2008-03-05 19:30:09    Post subject: Re: 洋洋洒洒,一路春之歌,结果真好看! Reply with quote

苏茉儿 wrote:
洋洋洒洒,一路春之歌,结果真好看!


春天,啊,你真好!
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是有缘
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Joined: 08 Feb 2008
Posts: 741

是有缘Collection
PostPosted: 2008-03-05 19:31:36    Post subject: Re: 迎春花开人人爱! Reply with quote

詩盜喜裸評 wrote:
迎春花开人人爱!


盗兄,偷偷地摘了几朵了吧?
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是有缘
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Joined: 08 Feb 2008
Posts: 741

是有缘Collection
PostPosted: 2008-03-05 19:32:25    Post subject: Re: 很春天的。 Reply with quote

悠子 wrote:
很春天的。


添了一星半点。
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是有缘
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Joined: 08 Feb 2008
Posts: 741

是有缘Collection
PostPosted: 2008-03-05 19:34:15    Post subject: Re: 恕我直言, ... Reply with quote

呆哥的女人 wrote:
恕我直言,
...


玩玩,水平有限,莫笑。谢谢您提的宝贵意见。
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是有缘
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Joined: 08 Feb 2008
Posts: 741

是有缘Collection
PostPosted: 2008-03-05 19:37:07    Post subject: Re: 这段不错哪~ Reply with quote

詩盜喜裸評 wrote:
诱惑地掀起了长长的裙摆
如美丽的少女跳起舞来


春风让春更迷人心态
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爱爱
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Joined: 03 Feb 2008
Posts: 167

爱爱Collection
PostPosted: 2008-03-05 19:38:05    Post subject: Reply with quote

迎春花偷偷地盛开
哈~~喜欢~~
偷偷的摘一朵~
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詩盜喜裸評
进士出身


Joined: 15 May 2007
Posts: 2984
Location: 台湾,台北
詩盜喜裸評Collection
PostPosted: 2008-03-05 19:38:57    Post subject: 您随意!俺干杯~为了今天的寿星、瘦星!还有我这个兽心~ Reply with quote

是有缘 wrote:
诗盗喜裸评 wrote:
迎春花开人人爱!


盗兄,偷偷地摘了几朵了吧?

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可情可理,去捧就真
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苏茉儿
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Joined: 31 Dec 2007
Posts: 739

苏茉儿Collection
PostPosted: 2008-03-05 19:42:47    Post subject: Re: 您随意!俺干杯~为了今天的寿星、瘦星!还有我这个兽心~ Reply with quote

詩盜喜裸評 wrote:
是有缘 wrote:
诗盗喜裸评 wrote:
迎春花开人人爱!


盗兄,偷偷地摘了几朵了吧?



哈哈,好啦,诗盗班长,也谢谢你。再顿首!各位玩好,茉儿梦去了。
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