Maple Review :: View topic - 城里的月光

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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌

城里的月光

沙漠
秀才

Joined: 26 Jan 2007
Posts: 977
Location: 中国温州
沙漠Collection

Posted: 2007-11-22 07:17:45 Post subject: 城里的月光

城里的月光像一片玻璃，砸在乱石上我高低都无法缝合那不流血的伤口这伤口，是一张鳄鱼的巨嘴我们亲手，把怀念的景象一一扔了进去。穿过比胡同悠长的岁月，默默凝视等待胡同口出现一双羊角辫，牵动一片月光然后把一些简单的日子，弄得丁当作响挤满低低的四合院回忆追不上凋零。银色湖面上隆起的现代肿瘤，梗塞了一腔歌喉玻璃渣散乱无语所有的抵挡，只是作为最初的牺牲品把自己和诗歌刺疼围巾你说你手笨只能将柔软的毛线织成一条围巾在那个年代，这算是一件奢侈品而我比年代还要奢侈一直到你远走他乡之后才发现，它有点像网平板、有孔而竟然没有落掉半点温暖 _________________ 个人博客http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1056295180

半溪明月
榜眼

Joined: 30 Sep 2006
Posts: 4760

半溪明月Collection

Posted: 2007-11-22 07:24:55 Post subject:

温馨的诗歌～问好沙漠！

白水
大学士

Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection

Posted: 2007-11-22 07:35:43 Post subject:

围巾你说你手笨只能将柔软的毛线织成一条围巾在那个年代，这算是一件奢侈品而我比年代还要奢侈一直到你远走他乡之后才发现，它有点像网平板、有孔而竟然没有落掉半点温暖 I DON'T KNOW WHAT I CAN SAY. 而我比年代还要奢侈一直到你远走他乡之后才发现，它有点像网平板、有孔而竟然没有落掉半点温暖

kokho
进士出身

Joined: 30 Nov 2006
Posts: 2642
Location: Singapore
kokhoCollection

Posted: 2007-11-22 14:18:14 Post subject:

。喜欢：）。。 _________________ 乒乓、摄影、诗歌

韩少君
进士出身

Joined: 06 Apr 2007
Posts: 2558
Location: 吉林四平
韩少君Collection

Posted: 2007-11-22 21:40:24 Post subject:

我还没得要领。先读了，再思量----- _________________ 靠才华为自己带来幸福的是才子;靠才华为自己带来痛苦的是诗人!!http://blog.sina.com.cn/hanshaojun345

白水
大学士

Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection

Posted: 2007-11-23 06:49:42 Post subject:

道模, 我之所以建议你读这首诗歌, 是因为我个人很欣赏这种风格. 与你分享吧(或许你未必喜欢). 比如这段: 而我比年代还要奢侈一直到你远走他乡之后才发现，它有点像网平板、有孔而竟然没有落掉半点温暖整段没有一个"情"字, 却让读者深深的感觉到"情"如网, 一直到你远走他乡之后/竟然没有落掉半点温暖. 这种无"剑"之境. 我觉得只可意会, 不可言传了. 此时硬说些BLABLA, 只为建议之因, 让你见笑了.

溪语
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Joined: 16 Mar 2007
Posts: 509
Location: 中国恩施
溪语Collection

Posted: 2007-11-23 07:00:22 Post subject:

它有点像网平板、有孔而竟然没有落掉半点温暖 _________________ 溪语的博客:家住鄂西

沙漠
秀才

Joined: 26 Jan 2007
Posts: 977
Location: 中国温州
沙漠Collection

Posted: 2007-11-24 08:50:02 Post subject:

感谢大家来读。谢谢白水的理解！ _________________ 个人博客http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1056295180

杨海军
进士出身

Joined: 01 Mar 2007
Posts: 2205
Location: 吉林
杨海军Collection

Posted: 2007-11-24 16:08:11 Post subject:

喜欢围巾。问候沙漠诗人！远握！ _________________ 走了很久了。还清晰地望见/身后那盏明灭的灯火/好像我们走的越久越远/故乡的那盏灯就越亮 ——拙作《离开村庄》 http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1269376751

moonlight
童生

Joined: 25 Dec 2006
Posts: 31
Location: TORONTO
moonlightCollection

Posted: 2008-01-01 03:54:14 Post subject:

飞雪春风又一度, 新朋老友何日归? 遥祝新年快乐

迪拜
同进士出身

Joined: 31 Oct 2006
Posts: 1588

迪拜Collection

Posted: 2008-01-01 17:00:28 Post subject:

问好不错

杯中冲浪
进士出身

Joined: 29 Sep 2006
Posts: 2891
Location: 中国
杯中冲浪Collection

Posted: 2008-01-01 18:26:27 Post subject:

沙漠的诗很好。 _________________ 杯中冲浪.披履而行 http://blog.sina.com.cn/shoutao006

阿依琼裙
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Joined: 09 Apr 2007
Posts: 920
Location: 废墟之上
阿依琼裙Collection

Posted: 2008-01-02 01:02:08 Post subject:

平板、有孔而竟然没有落掉半点温暖怀旧温暖~~ 新年快乐! _________________ 踏过废墟,走来 http://blog.sina.com.cn/m/weiyurong

了因大兄
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Joined: 15 Nov 2006
Posts: 209

了因大兄Collection

Posted: 2008-01-02 01:30:24 Post subject:

两首都看了,不错.问好! _________________ 我不是树上的黑木耳，我被爱过不能随随便便不回家 http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1236932795

sfiawong
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Joined: 05 May 2009
Posts: 813
Location: US/HK
sfiawongCollection

Posted: 2009-05-31 00:22:36 Post subject:

查閱你博客,好的詩不少. 比這兩篇好...領教了. 您已創出了風格. 我喜歡向君學習. 向沙漠君問好! _________________ 有評必回應. Love your relatives and friends when they are near you. 我的英文詩: http://poemhunter.com/albert-wong http://facebook.com/sfiawong

zmj166
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Joined: 10 Jan 2009
Posts: 461

zmj166Collection

Posted: 2009-10-14 04:33:36 Post subject:

有深度，喜欢啊！

朱雀公
童生

Joined: 17 Jul 2009
Posts: 31

朱雀公Collection

Posted: 2009-10-14 13:44:51 Post subject:

不错的诗歌呢。学习！问好！

金金
进士出身

Joined: 08 Feb 2007
Posts: 2035
Location: 山东济宁
金金Collection

Posted: 2009-10-15 18:24:27 Post subject:

瞧这设置，真棒！ _________________ http://blog.sina.com.cn/shirenjinjin

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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌

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