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电影镜头
杯中冲浪
进士出身


Joined: 29 Sep 2006
Posts: 2891
Location: 中国
杯中冲浪Collection
PostPosted: 2007-10-12 02:58:15    Post subject: 电影镜头 Reply with quote

电影镜头


这是最后的结局。一个俊朗的地下特工
逆着欢庆的人潮,面无表情的
向着解放前走去
他子弹一样执拗

战友和亲人面对着他
不停地倒下。出血已经粘黑
而他
不倒。他一直向着镜头僵尸一般的走
2007-10-12
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半溪明月
榜眼


Joined: 30 Sep 2006
Posts: 4760

半溪明月Collection
PostPosted: 2007-10-12 05:31:36    Post subject: Reply with quote

有什么寓意?要琢磨下~

今天服务器怎么不对呢?奇怪了 Crying or Very sad
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白水
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Joined: 02 Oct 2006
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Location: TORONTO
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PostPosted: 2007-10-12 06:41:36    Post subject: Reply with quote

虽稍显直白, 却非常感人. 为这种情怀.
商榷, "一个俊朗的地下特工", 地下, 可取掉, 似与韵律, 与意境都无碍. 己见, 不妥见谅 Embarassed
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半溪明月
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半溪明月Collection
PostPosted: 2007-10-12 07:22:30    Post subject: Reply with quote

呵呵,明白了,还真是个电影镜头呢~想复杂了!
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jemmy
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Joined: 06 Jun 2007
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PostPosted: 2007-10-13 02:52:24    Post subject: Reply with quote

hahahaha
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jemmy
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PostPosted: 2007-10-13 02:54:06    Post subject: Reply with quote

说到spy不知为什么要笑.其实,不可笑,或者,笑不出来
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杨海军
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Joined: 01 Mar 2007
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PostPosted: 2007-10-13 03:33:20    Post subject: Reply with quote

觉得不错的。
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走了很久了。还清晰地望见/身后那盏明灭的灯火/好像我们走的越久越远/故乡的那盏灯就越亮
——拙作《离开村庄》
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杯中冲浪
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PostPosted: 2007-10-13 16:01:00    Post subject: Reply with quote

问好各位朋友,这真是一个电影镜头,电影的最后结局,因感于导演的强悍的艺术性,而留下这几行文字。或许我没有能再现电影的画面,所以大家没有感到其中的美。那电影可能叙述潘汉年的故事,很美的情节,很感动人的人物。电影最后的画面是,陕北老农欢庆解放,而男主人公,逆着人流而行,执着的走,眼睛中不断出现回忆。
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jemmy
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PostPosted: 2007-10-13 17:53:30    Post subject: Reply with quote

不同的人会得出不同的理解,不管作者原来的创作意图如何.如果这真是你诗歌的成因,那我超极限祝贺你
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半溪明月
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PostPosted: 2007-10-13 18:05:58    Post subject: Reply with quote

杯中冲浪 wrote:
问好各位朋友,这真是一个电影镜头,电影的最后结局,因感于导演的强悍的艺术性,而留下这几行文字。或许我没有能再现电影的画面,所以大家没有感到其中的美。那电影可能叙述潘汉年的故事,很美的情节,很感动人的人物。电影最后的画面是,陕北老农欢庆解放,而男主人公,逆着人流而行,执着的走,眼睛中不断出现回忆。


呵呵,你写得挺好的,我后来读到的就是这感觉了,能够想象那画面
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半溪明月
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PostPosted: 2007-10-13 18:12:20    Post subject: Reply with quote

挺悲壮的感觉, 一个俊朗的地下特工   俊朗可以用英武代替吧,感觉分量不足~
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杯中冲浪
进士出身


Joined: 29 Sep 2006
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Location: 中国
杯中冲浪Collection
PostPosted: 2007-10-13 20:13:09    Post subject: Reply with quote

jemmy wrote:
不同的人会得出不同的理解,不管作者原来的创作意图如何.如果这真是你诗歌的成因,那我超极限祝贺你

说得好,我认为诗人最好没有题材限制,所写的东西有更大的张力。
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杯中冲浪
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PostPosted: 2007-10-13 20:15:22    Post subject: Reply with quote

半溪明月 wrote:
挺悲壮的感觉, 一个俊朗的地下特工   俊朗可以用英武代替吧,感觉分量不足~

俊朗士为了淡化那种凶杀之气,有些东西需要中庸,过强反而不美了。
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梅影三叠
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PostPosted: 2007-10-14 02:41:27    Post subject: Reply with quote

镜头感很强嘛
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