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【如梦令】(词林正韵*中华新韵)【】七绝.【锦绣中华】【归客】【幽客行】(新韵)(平水韵)
东来donglai
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PostPosted: 2015-06-21 04:20:24    Post subject: 【如梦令】(词林正韵*中华新韵)【】七绝.【锦绣中华】【归客】【幽客行】(新韵)(平水韵 Reply with quote

【】如梦令(*词林正韵*中华新韵*)

文:东来

远景烟山浩淼,
夏转浅秋古道。

日暮晚来风,
独自红尘笑傲。

青鸟,青鸟,
掠过梵音袅袅。

-------------------

七绝

《锦绣中华》

俯瞰神州千万里,
青山碧海尽妖娆。
民心所向雄狮吼,
大地飞歌震九霄。

------------------


七绝

《归客》

清幽月色照前庭,
午夜轻风唱晚情。
故地重游多感叹,
得失过往笑归零。

-------------------

七绝

《幽客行》

浅夏微凉竟自开,
幽林深谷有香来。
青山绕雾寻踪迹,
觅取兰心隐入怀。

东来(原创)
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qinghongh
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PostPosted: 2015-06-21 04:41:25    Post subject: Reply with quote

幽兰在深谷。好!
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东来donglai
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PostPosted: 2015-06-21 05:05:26    Post subject: Reply with quote

东来谢过qinghongh老师 Smile
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海蛎子
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PostPosted: 2015-06-22 00:27:41    Post subject: Reply with quote

小知识:北风无蜜,雾绕无香 Laughing
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东来donglai
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PostPosted: 2015-06-22 01:08:05    Post subject: Reply with quote

回海蛎子老师 北风无蜜,雾绕无香。


东来谢过海蛎子老师的评论,
本文中是绕雾而非雾绕,青山绕雾是动态,青山雾绕是状态。
山高林密藏幽谷,绕雾是流动的,绕雾或是在高处 或是在底处 ,又或是远或是近。
海蛎子老师不知东来解释可还过关 Laughing
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海蛎子
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PostPosted: 2015-06-22 02:26:04    Post subject: Reply with quote

哎呀妈呀,弯弯绕绕得挺顺,还算说得通。绕雾是动宾结构,雾绕是主谓结构,虽然结构不同,但形容的都是雾的形态 Laughing
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东来donglai
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PostPosted: 2015-06-22 02:36:03    Post subject: Reply with quote

Very Happy Very Happy 东来刚 歹(吃)过饭 匆匆前来 谢过海蛎子老师 Laughing Laughing
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海蛎子
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PostPosted: 2015-06-28 12:52:48    Post subject: Reply with quote

建议版主将此贴加精华 Laughing
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我为诗歌狂
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PostPosted: 2015-06-28 12:54:14    Post subject: Reply with quote

好好学习
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东来donglai
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PostPosted: 2015-07-01 04:30:54    Post subject: Reply with quote

东来谢过二位老师 Laughing
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婉芳
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PostPosted: 2015-07-01 11:15:35    Post subject: Reply with quote

好词!
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东来donglai
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PostPosted: 2015-08-10 03:35:32    Post subject: Reply with quote

东来谢过婉芳老师雅赏 shy face
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