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镜子(三首)
子在川上曰
举人


Joined: 18 Nov 2009
Posts: 1314

子在川上曰Collection
PostPosted: 2012-11-25 16:06:14    Post subject: 镜子(三首) Reply with quote

文/深圳,子在川上曰

《镜子》
每天,你在家要照三遍镜子。
外面的镜子照不出你,照的是别人。
看到一些人在镜子里面渐渐老了,
纸巾轻轻一擦,就彻底消失了。
回到家里,你打量着镜中的自己,
扮鬼脸,笑或者哭,都是老样子,
只是身后的背景,从春变成了秋。

《蝉和禅》
蝉早就没了,蝉卵在泥土里,等待着来年复生。
高高的树杈上,蝉蜕是曾经的影子,有形也无形。
喧嚣了整个夏天的蝉鸣,是伴随着木鱼声的梵唱,
一遍遍被风反复吹来。停了下来,就是无边的寂寞。
有老人、小孩经过,或者踩着了一枚打着旋儿的落叶,
你都会惊呼:哦,蝉。写成诗的时候,总习惯写成禅。

《月夜》
那个风尘女子,红颜美丽。
她用月光来照亮自己,用月华沐浴。
在风中,你一声叹息,她就飘走了。
却在梦中柔情款款,暗香四溢。
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白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2012-11-26 05:22:09    Post subject: Reply with quote

哦,蝉。写成诗的时候,总习惯写成禅。
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hepingdao
Site Admin


Joined: 25 May 2006
Posts: 8106

hepingdaoCollection
PostPosted: 2012-11-27 01:25:18    Post subject: Reply with quote

一组很有意趣的小诗, 有感觉
《镜子》 《蝉和禅》
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青洋
秀才


Joined: 25 Sep 2012
Posts: 342
Location: 溫哥華
青洋Collection
PostPosted: 2012-12-02 16:21:51    Post subject: Reply with quote

只是身后的背景,从春变成了秋。
《蝉和禅》
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金金
进士出身


Joined: 08 Feb 2007
Posts: 2035
Location: 山东济宁
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PostPosted: 2012-12-02 17:10:09    Post subject: Reply with quote

内力明显,很喜欢。


但是“蝉早就没了,蝉卵在泥土里,等待着来年复生”欠妥,蝉的卵在地下要17年才成幼虫。
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金金
进士出身


Joined: 08 Feb 2007
Posts: 2035
Location: 山东济宁
金金Collection
PostPosted: 2012-12-02 17:11:13    Post subject: Reply with quote

外面的镜子照不出你,照的是别人。
看到一些人在镜子里面渐渐老了,
纸巾轻轻一擦,就彻底消失了。
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