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和白水二首
黄洋界
探花


Joined: 23 Mar 2007
Posts: 3301
Location: 多伦多,加拿大
黄洋界Collection
PostPosted: 2007-04-01 06:50:15    Post subject: 和白水二首 Reply with quote

七绝 天鹅湖

轻张两翼映霞红,
万里长风逐远空,
自去自来随意趣,
无羁无绊任西东.

七绝 火鸟
冰请玉洁显雍华,
母体如船载乳鸭,
相伴相依情切切,
平湖静处建新家.
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凤舞九天
童生


Joined: 10 Mar 2007
Posts: 30

凤舞九天Collection
PostPosted: 2007-04-01 12:09:32    Post subject: Reply with quote

好啊!有朝气。
顺便一说,口语入句向来是中国诗歌的特点,也是它不断发展的动力源。今天如果我们只能用唐宋人的口吻遣词造句,那么它究竟能获得多少共鸣?
我认为继承--应该是继承格律上的美学原理和思路;发展,是内容上的革新,在用韵上则应首先选择贴近现代日常口语的新韵或诗韵。一首用平水韵写的诗,在一般读者用现代普通话念的时候,已差不多将格律上的美学效果破坏殆尽。那么,换句话说,格律也就失去了存在的意义了。
_________________
不需刻意求佳境 自有奇逢应平生
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白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2007-04-02 07:54:25    Post subject: Reply with quote

谢谢你的和诗.把原作和图跟过来了. 另, 你两首诗的标题是否错位了? Confused

七绝<火鸟>

凌云展翅落霞红, 戏日孤鸥舞碧空.
笑看中原逐鹿客, 清歌一曲傲西东.




摄影:和平岛
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白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2007-04-02 08:08:22    Post subject: Reply with quote

七绝<天鹅湖>

平湖雪影映雍华, 赤水白云匿小鸭
母子依依情愫暖, 天涯处处有新家




没有绘画之才, 只好在GOOGLE搜一张充数了. Embarassed
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