Lake 举人
注册时间: 2007-01-09 帖子: 1286
Lake北美枫文集 |
发表于: 2010-04-27 05:53:35 发表主题: Angry Summer |
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Angry Summer
Don’t be rhetorical, my dear, don’t be rhetorical
when you decide to leave but say it's fate I suppose.
Don’t roll ephemeral ever forever off your tongue
for who'd tune an ear to a solemnly flippant oath.
Don’t hide behind an email with heart wrenching
words like a woman wearing a veil wets her handkerchief.
It’s time when water subsides, rocks emerge
I’ll laugh off this angry summer with a joyous grief.
The moon's never been this huge this round this orange
as I drive up the top of the hillside, seeing her full visage. _________________ the trouble with poetry is that it encourages the writing of more poetry -- Billy Collins |
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justjust123 童生
注册时间: 2009-11-01 帖子: 22
justjust123北美枫文集 |
发表于: 2010-06-03 21:05:13 发表主题: |
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on the top of a hill, you gaze upon the moon, bright and yet silent. then you look down and see another moon in water. suddenly fish leap everywhere . o, there are more fish in the sea.
the line 'It’s the time when...' does not sound right, it seems |
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Lake 举人
注册时间: 2007-01-09 帖子: 1286
Lake北美枫文集 |
发表于: 2010-06-05 07:11:56 发表主题: |
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Thanks Just for the read. I thought it'd sink to the bottom of the page without any comments.
Can you elaborate on why the line doesn't sound right?
Thanks. _________________ the trouble with poetry is that it encourages the writing of more poetry -- Billy Collins |
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justjust123 童生
注册时间: 2009-11-01 帖子: 22
justjust123北美枫文集 |
发表于: 2010-06-05 10:13:03 发表主题: |
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When I was reading the line, I thought you meant : It’s time for water to subside and rocks to emerge.
If 'when' has to be used, this to me sounds a little more natural though I prefer the one above:
Now is the time when water subsides and rocks emerge.
Somehow, I do not feel 'it' and 'when' match here. Of course, I may be wrong. |
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Lake 举人
注册时间: 2007-01-09 帖子: 1286
Lake北美枫文集 |
发表于: 2010-06-08 14:51:00 发表主题: |
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Now I see. I guess there's some difference between the two, is there?
Anyway, this is a tired expression. I don't quite like it.
Thanks for the explanation. _________________ the trouble with poetry is that it encourages the writing of more poetry -- Billy Collins |
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