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为妓女写诗
后现代刀子
童生


Joined: 21 Feb 2009
Posts: 59

后现代刀子Collection
PostPosted: 2009-04-12 22:52:31    Post subject: 为妓女写诗 Reply with quote

在我看来,她们是被春天扔出来的
接着被欲望吃掉。恶狠狠地
被叫做鸡,拥有翅膀
却不能飞翔。最终带着眼泪
成为花枝招展的牛群和羊群
放牧到酒店、洗头房、招待所
色情农场上,没有草和远方
逃。一望无际的生活
像极了一张网。被捕捉
囚禁。祖国960万平方公里的面积
她们只被允许活动在床上
有时,爱情、学校、故乡
也会来到身边。喝杯白开水、坐一会儿
可还是和太阳一样,滚进来又滚出去
烫。强烈的想念变成无力的想象
日子既漫长又漫长
如同海绵。在弹性上面无表情
这让黑暗茁壮成长。成为肇事者
导致梦想和现实相撞。没有办法
只能自己受伤。只能
摊开洁白的床单和身体,赤裸裸
开始工作。为各种各样的阳具
摆出,各种各样的姿势
不同的勃起,一样的钻心疼痛
成吨的苦难分解成一个个体重
压在她们身上。抽动
因此,她们的名声和贞节被摔坏
粉碎。掷地有声
尽管尊严并没有和裤子一起脱下
可还是成为泄欲工程上的农民工
弱势。底层。疾病。矮。累。精疲力竭
直不起腰。从而看起来不如正常人那么高
那么动听。理所当然地
被插、被钻、被骑、被打开、被
戳破、被挤奶、被践踏、被蹂躏
还要努力制造出呻吟和微笑
满足禽兽乳白色的高潮
被射。获得精液和唾液,之后才是钞票
皱巴巴的,如同她们的青春
被揉搓、被强迫、被攥、被抓
最终被抛弃。而
在此期间,不断地有
干部、商贩、小偷、专家、警察、学者
医生、学生、诗人、政客、僧侣、教师
(猴子、猴子、猴子、猴子、猴子、猴子
猴子、猴子、猴子、猴子、猴子、猴子)
对她们雪白的身体,爬上来
又爬下去



09、04、13下午
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安红红
同进士出身


Joined: 07 Feb 2009
Posts: 1808

安红红Collection
PostPosted: 2009-04-14 07:36:14    Post subject: Reply with quote

应该是旧社会的~
新社会大多不是这样的原因从妓的~
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如果不开始,会失去过程。
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微信:qisebaihuayuan
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魏鵬展
秀才


Joined: 14 Apr 2009
Posts: 606
Location: Hong Kong 香港
魏鵬展Collection
PostPosted: 2009-04-14 07:53:46    Post subject: Reply with quote

很有創意的主題和手法。
你是男還是女?
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香港文學報《小說與詩》投稿方法+稿約、稿例、最新一期目錄:
http://blog.sina.com.cn/s/blog_60b7bcff01018dcp.html

魏鵬展是香港詩人、《小說與詩》主編、中文教師;微信(WeChat): npcjeffrey
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nobody
进士出身


Joined: 31 Dec 2006
Posts: 2651
Location: Madtown
nobodyCollection
PostPosted: 2009-04-14 15:35:54    Post subject: Reply with quote

白描,有冲击力。结尾不错。
但总体没有深度思考,或选择一个引发深度思考的角度去描写。
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云冰之南
童生


Joined: 12 Apr 2009
Posts: 57

云冰之南Collection
PostPosted: 2009-04-14 16:23:01    Post subject: Reply with quote

有深度的震撼力!反省的思绪多多!
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电子信箱:fangyi-66@163.com
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半溪明月
榜眼


Joined: 30 Sep 2006
Posts: 4760

半溪明月Collection
PostPosted: 2009-04-14 16:39:56    Post subject: Reply with quote

nobody wrote:
白描,有冲击力。结尾不错。
...
同意安红红无人的观点,语言不错!
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