Maple Review :: View topic - 《天暗了下来》

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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌

《天暗了下来》

了因大兄
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Joined: 15 Nov 2006
Posts: 209

了因大兄Collection

Posted: 2007-02-26 07:02:16 Post subject: 《天暗了下来》

《天暗了下来》云，还在天上飘，还在头顶我理解，这自然的冲动这些油漆脱落，灰暗不均的船板已无法再把风浪打碎的船，重构。云，还在天上飘，还在头顶月亮，被遮住了倦容，失语的痛不会再被漆黑的铁撞响不能再唤醒水手，溺水的舵。我无法再仰视它们，我弯下腰系紧鞋带大山如锚，我领着我还要在交错的阴影里，独自摸索一阵。 2007/2/2 _________________ 我不是树上的黑木耳，我被爱过不能随随便便不回家 http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1236932795

白水
大学士

Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection

Posted: 2007-02-26 08:08:34 Post subject:

压抑中的淡定. 欣赏

nobody
进士出身

Joined: 31 Dec 2006
Posts: 2651
Location: Madtown
nobodyCollection

Posted: 2007-02-26 20:07:42 Post subject:

我被爱过不能随随便便不回家难道被爱“过“，就这样吗？也太模范了！有人被爱“着“ 还随随便便不回家 _________________ I'm nobody! Who are you?

杯中冲浪
进士出身

Joined: 29 Sep 2006
Posts: 2891
Location: 中国
杯中冲浪Collection

Posted: 2007-02-27 05:02:15 Post subject:

感觉很好。 _________________ 杯中冲浪.披履而行 http://blog.sina.com.cn/shoutao006

左岸
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Joined: 12 Oct 2006
Posts: 215
Location: 中国大连
左岸Collection

Posted: 2007-02-27 05:10:06 Post subject:

很有新意，诗有跌宕。 _________________ 黑暗怎样焊住灵魂的银河

了因大兄
秀才

Joined: 15 Nov 2006
Posts: 209

了因大兄Collection

Posted: 2007-03-01 04:23:24 Post subject:

白水 Moonlight wrote:

压抑中的淡定. 欣赏

问好！多批。
_________________
我不是树上的黑木耳，我被爱过
不能随随便便不回家
http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1236932795

了因大兄
秀才

Joined: 15 Nov 2006
Posts: 209

了因大兄Collection

Posted: 2007-03-01 04:24:34 Post subject:

nobody wrote:

我被爱过
不能随随便便不回家

难道被爱“过“，就这样吗？也太模范了！

有人被爱“着“
还随随便便不回家

哈哈，你说的有理。
_________________
我不是树上的黑木耳，我被爱过
不能随随便便不回家
http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1236932795

了因大兄
秀才

Joined: 15 Nov 2006
Posts: 209

了因大兄Collection

Posted: 2007-03-01 04:25:27 Post subject:

杯中冲浪 wrote:

感觉很好。

问好！多指点。
_________________
我不是树上的黑木耳，我被爱过
不能随随便便不回家
http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1236932795

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