莹雪
进士出身
Joined: 28 Sep 2006
Posts: 2520
Location: 中国－辽宁·三燕故都
莹雪Collection |
 Posted: 2007-09-09 17:08:09 Post subject: 七绝－歇笔两日有感（新韵） |
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婆娑桂影梦中馨，曼妙蛩吟泣泪夤。
放笔兰舟临水趣，闲情陋室展精神。 |
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征尘载袖
秀才
Joined: 18 Aug 2007
Posts: 527
Location: 臭豆腐作坊
征尘载袖Collection |
| Posted: 2007-09-09 19:09:04 Post subject: |
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莹雪，你解释一下用的韵^_^
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莹雪
进士出身
Joined: 28 Sep 2006
Posts: 2520
Location: 中国－辽宁·三燕故都
莹雪Collection |
| Posted: 2007-09-09 19:50:43 Post subject: |
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| 征尘载袖 wrote: |
| 莹雪，你解释一下用的韵^_^ |
哦，有什么不对么？
第一句“馨”吧，是新韵，［人文韵[en in uen un]：平声］，平起七绝，“◎○◎●●○○，◎●○○●●△。◎●◎○○●●，◎○◎●●○△”，第一句可以不押韵。
至于二、四“寅”，“神”是平水韵［十一真］。我俄了，去吃饭了，  就不把平水韵十一真给你复过来喽！886袖袖^_^  |
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征尘载袖
秀才
Joined: 18 Aug 2007
Posts: 527
Location: 臭豆腐作坊
征尘载袖Collection |
| Posted: 2007-09-09 20:14:13 Post subject: |
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呀，还跟我转上了，那你就先 ，把肠子抻直了^_^
近体诗中，平收的首句不押韵时，一般是使用邻韵或通韵的^_^
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白水
大学士
Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection |
| Posted: 2007-09-09 20:33:41 Post subject: |
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哈, 看你们乐  |
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莹雪
进士出身
Joined: 28 Sep 2006
Posts: 2520
Location: 中国－辽宁·三燕故都
莹雪Collection |
| Posted: 2007-09-09 22:25:54 Post subject: |
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| 征尘载袖 wrote: |
呀，还跟我转上了，那你就先 ，把肠子抻直了^_^
近体诗中，平收的首句不押韵时，一般是使用邻韵或通韵的^_^ |
嗯，我吃饱  袖袖你吃了吗 
谢谢袖袖提示^_^我知道。写的时候，还想着要注明新韵，唉！发的时候就没注  抱歉，抱歉  下次一定注意  嘻嘻，坚决不改  ^_^ |
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莹雪
进士出身
Joined: 28 Sep 2006
Posts: 2520
Location: 中国－辽宁·三燕故都
莹雪Collection |
| Posted: 2007-09-09 22:27:11 Post subject: |
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| 白水 Moonlight wrote: |
| 哈, 看你们乐 |
问好JJ^_^ |
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