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哑榴跟帖留评
山城子
榜眼


Joined: 23 May 2007
Posts: 4771
Location: 中国贵州
山城子Collection
PostPosted: 2011-04-02 06:49:07    Post subject: 哑榴跟帖留评 Reply with quote

哑榴跟帖留评

山城子的帖子:
铁皮青蛙——文字拍照小天使[30]

失踪月余,被从沙发缝发现回来
小天使淡化了先前的记忆
铁皮青蛙又成了新的玩具
上紧发条就蹦,孙女儿把它抓了回来
递给爷爷-我懂是让再加力
这样的-我们自然形成了分工合作
我负责-拧与放
她负责-抓与递
2011-04-02于上海


哑榴跟帖留评:

这首诗细腻,亲切,动感。
写得朴素,自然。
就像那跳动的铁皮青蛙,
真的打动了我。
我们写诗,缺少观察,
对尘封里的好东西挖掘不出来。
我想,这首诗歌,
为我们的创作提供了最有说服力的证明。

原来,即使是一件被遗忘的铁皮青蛙,
也可以写成
蹦跶蹦跶有趣的诗歌!
这是我们的方向!!!!

精华不在意是不是大作,
即使一首朴素的小诗,也可以成为精华之作。
如同最美丽的鲜花,不在乎
她的花瓣和骨朵的大小。而在乎
她朴素而自然的异香。哪怕是淡淡的,也是我们眼里最美的!

这首诗歌最大的启发就在于我们对所发现之物是什么态度。
我们感到最亲切的往往是不以为常的忽略的东西。
我们对待诗歌也应该是如此——自己看中的,看重的
一定会是经过创作打磨以后成为最经典的!

和山城子老师:铁青蛙
文/哑榴

这只铁皮青蛙
仿佛童年的那首小诗
从沙发底下找出来
有人拧紧
还会跳跃一阵子

尘封的记忆里
还潜着多少
会跳跃的
铁青蛙
和惊喜

_________________
诗是人生的雅伴儿。
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山城子
榜眼


Joined: 23 May 2007
Posts: 4771
Location: 中国贵州
山城子Collection
PostPosted: 2011-12-09 23:50:05    Post subject: Reply with quote

提上来!!
_________________
诗是人生的雅伴儿。
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