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Author Message
  Topic: 七绝·蝉殉 及 七绝·蝉误
婉芳

Replies: 2
Views: 1501

PostForum: 古韵新音   Posted: 2015-08-05 16:31:34   Subject: 七绝·蝉殉 及 七绝·蝉误
第一首,明明螳螂捕蝉,你写成殉情,相思,呵呵,有趣。

第二首,苦守深熬从蛹化,层层净蜕始出金。

这两句诗写的很有味道。蝉在地下几年才 ...
  Topic: 填词菊花新两首兼翻唱烟花三月
婉芳

Replies: 5
Views: 2446

PostForum: 古韵新音   Posted: 2015-07-06 03:23:25   Subject: 填词菊花新两首兼翻唱烟花三月
见到五瓣丁香是幸运的,你为闺蜜写的词优美,活泼,还表达了闺蜜内心的虔诚。
烟花三月歌声婉转,柔情无限,好像是跟恋人徜徉在江南的山光水色 ...
  Topic: (原创)律诗-明月湾度假有感
婉芳

Replies: 14
Views: 4504

PostForum: 古韵新音   Posted: 2015-07-01 18:19:51   Subject: (原创)律诗-明月湾度假有感
谢谢,真是听君一席言,胜读十年书。您写诗的心得体会都传授给我们了。
  Topic: 【如梦令】(词林正韵*中华新韵)【】七绝.【锦绣中华】【归客】【幽客行】(新韵)(平水韵)
婉芳

Replies: 11
Views: 4641

PostForum: 古韵新音   Posted: 2015-07-01 11:15:35   Subject: 【如梦令】(词林正韵*中华新韵)【】七绝.【锦绣中华】【归客】【幽客行】(新韵)(平水韵)
好词!
  Topic: (原创)律诗-明月湾度假有感
婉芳

Replies: 14
Views: 4504

PostForum: 古韵新音   Posted: 2015-06-29 17:18:24   Subject: (原创)律诗-明月湾度假有感
这是我百度的新韵。楼上可以看看。
...

谢谢了!不过,哎呦,看着这个我都吓着了。
  Topic: (原创)律诗-明月湾度假有感
婉芳

Replies: 14
Views: 4504

PostForum: 古韵新音   Posted: 2015-06-29 17:02:38   Subject: (原创)律诗-明月湾度假有感
如果要我的话,费劲也能写出八句话来。意境肯定达不到您的高度。还有,我一点不知道平仄和韵,请问您是怎么做的?您在写的时候就想到平仄和韵 ...
  Topic: (原创)律诗-明月湾度假有感
婉芳

Replies: 14
Views: 4504

PostForum: 古韵新音   Posted: 2015-06-29 16:49:44   Subject: (原创)律诗-明月湾度假有感
像一副画。
  Topic: 五言:蚁族
婉芳

Replies: 6
Views: 1990

PostForum: 古韵新音   Posted: 2015-06-29 15:41:44   Subject: 五言:蚁族
平仄和诗的一些规律我不懂。不过我喜欢你这首诗表达的意境。前三段以白描的手法,描写现实。最后一段隐晦的写出了不通阶层人之间的隔膜。

我 ...
  Topic: 五言: 箜篌 (再改)
婉芳

Replies: 21
Views: 6586

PostForum: 古韵新音   Posted: 2015-06-29 12:09:12   Subject: 五言: 箜篌 (再改)
佩服!这些知识恐怕得花几十年学习。
  Topic: 七言 细雨漫步(修改)
婉芳

Replies: 8
Views: 2130

PostForum: 古韵新音   Posted: 2015-06-29 03:31:46   Subject: 七言 细雨漫步(修改)
谢谢耐心指点。佩服至极。
喜欢古体诗,有时候会写几句自乐。对我来说,写诗要达到讲押韵,目前太难了。您指教的这些,我都是头一次听说。不过 ...
  Topic: 绝句-咏梅和寒泉
婉芳

Replies: 2
Views: 958

PostForum: 古韵新音   Posted: 2015-06-28 14:47:56   Subject: 绝句-咏梅和寒泉
用词讲究,古风盎然。
  Topic: 七言 细雨漫步(修改)
婉芳

Replies: 8
Views: 2130

PostForum: 古韵新音   Posted: 2015-06-28 14:16:37   Subject: 七言 细雨漫步(修改)
细雨漫步

细雨霏霏花枝舒,轻风拂波暖香湖。
遥看燕儿回旋舞,往事心头有还无。


注:不敢称诗。随便写来与大家共乐。

根据笑老师的指 ...
  Topic: 五言: 箜篌 (再改)
婉芳

Replies: 21
Views: 6586

PostForum: 古韵新音   Posted: 2015-06-28 09:32:11   Subject: 啧啧,这诗写的。清丽脱俗。
啧啧,这诗写的。清丽脱俗。
 
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